They're

They're jokes

People

    • I have two things I wanna say:

    1. When people swear, stop taking it so fucking literally. If someone calls you a bitch, they're not calling you a female dog. If they call you a cunt, they're not calling you a woman's private part, they are calling you either an idiot, scaredy cat/baby, or something along those lines, ffs.

    2. wtf

  • 6

    • Baby

    • What do teen mothers and their unborn babies have in common?

    They're both thinking "Oh my God, my mom's gonna kill me!"

  • 1
    • They're memes

    Film

    • I heard they're making a film about Jimmy Savile, it's a very touchy subject.

    I heard the film about is so boring it puts you to sleep.

  • 0

    • Penis

    • True Story

    A CO was receiving inmates as they're being recalled from their assigned jobs to prepare for count. An inmate that had passed the officer returned bleeding through his trousers from his crotch. The inmate had an argument with his lover who had told him that he wasn't enough woman for him. As the inmate was bleeding he was crying out, "He doesn't love me anymore!"

    The officer called for medical assistance and went into the assigned cell. He found the severed penis. He fished it out of the toilet and placed it in a plastic bag with ice. He claimed that the medical staff at the hospital could reattach it. He took a ribbing from his fellow officers, because most would've flushed it. I retired and months later saw a fellow officer at the store. As we caught up, I mentioned that the last incident I responded to was 'the severed penis.' The officer tells me that the inmate severed his penis again after it was reattached and flushed it himself.

  • 1

    • Case

    • What does a lawyer defending a killer and a password have in common? They're case sensitive.

  • 0

    • CEO

    • CEO Intrepid entrepreneur born in 1964, Jeffrey, Jeffrey Bezos.

    Repeat, come on Jeffrey, you can do it, pave the way, put your back into it, tell us why, show us how, look at where you came from, look at you now.

    Zuckerberg and Gates and Musk, they're the anchors, can make and sick it up there with drink their blood, come on Jeff get it! Dododoododododod

  • 2

    • People

    • What does a deaf person do when they hear people scream? I don't know; it's not like they're gonna hear it anyway.