They're jokes
Why can't orphans be robbers?
Because they're not wanted.
Why do orphans not know if they're lactose intolerant?
Because their dad never came back with milk.
They're making a new Alien movie.
There are so many aliens you can't keep track.
Orphan, they're enough of a joke.
What's worse than a failed suicide, you ask?
I fail suicide because you forgot to do the dishes and your parents come after you and they're the ones to kill you, not yourself.
Memes
Don't break girls' hearts. Break their legs instead. They're two.
What’s the similarity between a broken pencil and my life? They’re both pointless.
You know they're lying when they say, "My mom's picking me up."
Why are cheetahs not good at hiding?
They’re always spotted!
Guys, we need to stop telling orphan jokes, they're gonna tell their parents. Oh wait, never mind, continue.
Why do crabs never give to charity?
Because they're all shellfish.
If you ever get cold, just go to a corner because they're usually 90 degrees.
What do Hiroshima and Herobrine have in common?
They're not heroes.
Why are these jokes bad?
They're literally the worst jokes ever.
What does a pregnant lady and pigs have in common?
They're both fat.
What’s bin Laden got in common with SpongeBob?
Both can be found at the bottom of the sea, and they’re filled with holes.
Why are Nazis so good at soccer?
Because they're so good at shooting.
They used to laugh when I said I wanted to be a comedian.
Well, they're not laughing now!
Never trust stairs, they're always up to something.
Why is the record for longest jump kept by an emo?
They're still hanging.