The 20+ Best Grammar Jokes

An old teacher asked her student, "If I say, 'I am beautiful,' which tense is that?" The student replied, "It is obviously past."

One day Little Johnny's class is having an English lesson. The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word intelligent in a sentence?" Little Mary says, "The teacher is very intelligent." The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word fashionable in a sentence?" Little Suzie says, "They are very fashionable." The teacher says, "Johnny, why don't you have a go? Use the word dictate in a sentence." Johnny thinks for a moment and then says, "Last night I heard Daddy asking Mommy 'Darling how does my dictate' "

I won't reply on every jokes today because I want to say thanks (to everyone) for making funny jokes here... Every time I have a bad day (almost everyday), I always go here and read relatable jokes, its makes me happy and its making me less anxious. I am really stressed on my school works and everything, I feel that I'm being left alone. Everyone compares me to others and all I can do is listen. I don't get enough sleep because of it... Reading these jokes entertain me and making me laugh so hard. *I apologize for my grammar

The past, the present, and the future walk into a bar...

It was tense.

English is weird. -- It can be understood through tough thorough thought, though.

Grammar: It's the difference between knowing your shit and knowing you're shit.

What is the difference between a cat and a complex sentence? -- A cat has claws at the end of its paws. A complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause.

What happened when the semicolon broke grammar laws? -- It was given two consecutive sentences.

Someone at school judged my grammar. I judged theirs by the terms "school" and "rifle range" being mixed up the next day.

"Sir, we're mining too many useless mineral ores." Hitler: "Mine less, then."

Grammar Nazi bursts in: "MINE FEWER."

Hitler looks over: "Yes?"

I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. Why? I don't know y.

Why do Pirates say "Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!" ? First time out at sea, they prepare for battle and say to their commander: "The canons be ready Captain!" "Are" says the Captain (correcting their grammar) "Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!" they all exclaimed !!

I am trying to re comment something that used to be on here, but is no longer on here. Here are some rules to make a good joke: 1: don’t say “my life” 2: proof read your joke, and make sure people can read it/have good grammar in it 3: And don’t re post things (although this last one is hippocritical because this was me trying to repost something but it is still a good rule to go by)

If life gives you melons, you're proababli dyslexic

I am only familiar with 25 letters of the alphabet

I font know y

Is butt cheeks one word or should I spread them apart

The general proofreading Hitler's speeches was the original Grammar Nazi

In kindergarten we were starting to learn how to use "big kid words." On Monday, the teacher asked everyone to share what they did over the weekend, but we had to use big kid words. Eventually it got to my turn, and the teacher asked me what I did over the summer. I told her I read a book. She asked me what book, and to remember to use "big kid words." I'll never forget the horrified look on her face when I replied with "Winnie the Shit"

It’s important to establish a good vocabulary. If I had known the difference between the words “antidote” and “anecdote,” one of my best friends would still be alive.