Halloween Jokes

There was a costume party on Halloween. Everyone was there except one guy. Many people asked his brother where he was. His reply was, "Oh, he wanted to be our dad for Halloween."

This year my friends wanted to dress up as crayons for Halloween. They asked me if I wanted to be a tan crayon. I didn’t want to, but I said yes to be nice. I wish I had said no, because now I look like a dick to everyone else.

This guy tried to kill me and i asked "what is this? Friday the Thirteenth?" Michael replied ": nah, its Halloween"

I went trick or treating this year with friends. Good thing I dressed as a zombie ....... no one could tell that it was their blood


me: *stabs vampire*

wife: omg

me: *beats vampire to death*

wife: OMG

me: what

wife: ur supposed to give them candy

me: well thats a sticky situation now isnt it barbara

I was in a haunted house today. Nothing scared me until I reached the last room where I saw the scariest Halloween ghost I've ever seen. He took my pens and ghosted. I was told that i saw pristiano penaldo and I was lucky enough to see him because he performs once in a blue moon