There was a costume party on Halloween. Everyone was there except one guy. Many people asked his brother where he was. His reply was, "Oh, he wanted to be our dad for Halloween."
What do incest families do on Halloween? Pumpkin
This guy tried to kill me and i asked "what is this? Friday the Thirteenth?" Michael replied ": nah, its Halloween"
Why didn’t the skeleton go to the party : He had nobody to go with
When it's been Halloween for a few months, but there's still a body hanging from your neighbor's tree.
Halloween! The day nobody questions the bodies dangling in your tree!
This year my friends wanted to dress up as crayons for Halloween. They asked me if I wanted to be a tan crayon. I didn’t want to, but I said yes to be nice. I wish I had said no, because now I look like a dick to everyone else.
What is a paedophiles favorite thing about halloween?
Free delivery XD
Why do programmers always mix up Halloween and Christmas? - Because Oct 31 == Dec 25
me: *stabs vampire*
wife: omg
me: *beats vampire to death*
wife: OMG
me: what
wife: ur supposed to give them candy
me: well thats a sticky situation now isnt it barbara
Why do emo kids love dressing up on Halloween so much?
It's there last holiday for them but at least there still hanging on...
What does an emo do on Halloween, they hang like a decoration
What is a pedophiles favorite part about Halloween? -- Free delivery.
Yo mama is so ugly, she walked into a haunted house and walked out with a job application.
i'ts best not to say hail satan because he can't control the weather!
Do you ever wonder why Michael from Halloween likes his mask so much? It's because he ad-MYERS it.
whats yellow and cant swim? my mom on halloween
How do you know a vampire's sick?
If he's coffin (coughing?)
Why didnt the skeleton cross the road?
Because he was part of the Lazy Bones team!
Last halloween i went dressed as a woman. When i rang the doorbell an elderly woman opened and i made grunting noise and knocked the bowl of candy out of her hands. She immediately called the police and told them excactly what happened. The officer pulled me aside and asked me a few questions. First he asked are your parents here and i said nothing. Concerned by my answer he then asked if i was ok so i said nothing. He asked me what my name and i responded, "Hellen Keller.
