Short jokes
To all of you who can't understand using jokes as a coping mechanism... you know what I will ask of you :)
What do Hostess Twinkies and the cock of a gay man have in common?
🐓 🐓 🐓 🐓 🐓 🐓 🍦 🍦 🍦 🍦 🍦 🍦 🍨 🍨 🍨 🍨
I call my friends Dodo birds. Because they don't exist.
What do you call the whole population turning into emos?
The Great Depression.
My uncle said he wants to be a dinosaur. I said why... he said so I could be extinct 😭😭
Why did the boy get run over?
Sally was driving.
What music do Astronauts listen to?
Nep-tunes.
When you ask your sister if she wanna smash, but then she grabs the Switch.
What do a fat chick and a moped have in common?
They’re both fun to ride until your friends find out.
I wanted to play as Kobe in my console, but the game crashed.
This is really mean...
A man put a blind man in a circular room and said, "Your dinner's in the corner."
The reason why the "eating a tide pod" trend ended so fast is because everyone that did it died.
Why did Mia Khalifa become so famous?
Because she blew up.
Where did Lucy go during the bombing?
Everywhere.
What do you call shaving a crazy sheep? -- Shear madness.
I have no father. Like if you relate.
If Stephen Hawking has a heart attack, do you take him to Halfords or A&E?
I once heard my dad shout, "I'm going to be like Frozen and let it go!" Then I heard a gunshot.
What do you get when you combine a priest and lawyer? A Father-in-law.
My friend died from an allergic reaction. He gave me an EpiPen while he was dying, so now I have something to remember him from.