Short jokes

You know the difference between me and a zebra? Me neither.

[Them]: "Don't you think you'll feel ashamed of all the suicide jokes you've made when you get older?"

[Me]: "When I what?" 0-0

A bomb is like a baby; when you drop it, everyone screams.

I don't struggle with depression, I'm used to it.

I saw a fat dude wearing a shirt that said "guess." I said 215kg, he didn't find it as funny.

I don’t like to make jokes around dwarfs.

Simply because they look up to me.

What do you call a crowd of horny white women?

A field of cotton waiting to be picked.

My dad told me to stop with the suicide jokes, so I said I’ll cut it out.

My kids found me in the family tree. I was hanging there for hours.

What did the taco say to the Sea Turtle? I like your shell!

Why did the orphan like to jump? So they can jump off a bridge to be reunited with their parents.

1 like = 10 more orphans in my basement.

What do you find in Jeffrey Dahmer's shower?

Heads and shoulders.

I had a very long dream that I was eating the most juiciest, tastiest meal I'd ever eaten in my life. Then when I woke up, my wife was gone.

What do you call a sneaky child molester?

Incogpedo.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

They can't find home.

"Man, your jokes about homicide are totally killer!"

What does Michael Jackson do with his meat? "Just beat it". His song btw lol.

Nah c'mon guys, we don't let jokes like this fly around here.

I got jealous of the zebras. Sorry, I’ll cut it out. I wanted to practice for my med school test.

You know how in Pinocchio the French puppets have the thigh rings?

Well, I got them too! Only red and thinner.