Short jokes

Short jokes

Orphan

Why did the orphan like to jump? So they can jump off a bridge to be reunited with their parents.

1 like = 10 more orphans in my basement.

Film

What do the films The Sixth Sense and Titanic have in common?

Icy dead people.

Dad

My dad told me to stop with the suicide jokes, so I said I’ll cut it out.

Dream

I had a very long dream that I was eating the most juiciest, tastiest meal I'd ever eaten in my life. Then when I woke up, my wife was gone.

Jack and Jill

Jack and Jill went up a hill to smoke a little leaf.

Jack got high and dropped his fly, and Jill said "Where’s The beef?"

Adoption

I asked my mom where babies come from. She said I came from the adoption center.

Mistake

Kid: What is the biggest mistake you made in your life?

Parents: Go look above the bathroom sink.

Kid goes and looks, but then he realizes.

Noose

My friend asked me why I know how to tie a noose.

I told them, "because I’m such a noose-ance."

Orphan

Why can orphans never be kidnapped?

No one can tell them that "your parents said that they would be delayed and I was told to pick you up."

Hiroshima

Why did Joe Biden visit Hiroshima? Because the city has the hottest prepubescent girls in the world.

Self Harm

You know how in Pinocchio the French puppets have the thigh rings?

Well, I got them too! Only red and thinner.