The oldest computer can be traced back to Adam and Eve. It was an apple but with extremely limited memory. Just 1 byte. And then everything crashed.

The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve. It was an Apple with limited memory, just one byte. And then everything crashed.

A computer science student is studying under a tree and another pulls up on a flashy new bike. The first student asks, “Where’d you get that?”

The student on the bike replies, “While I was studying outside, a beautiful girl pulled up on her bike. She took off all her clothes and said, “You can have anything you want.””

The first student responds, “Good choice! Her clothes probably wouldn’t have fit you.”

What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and the computer he’s hooked up to? – The computer runs.

Window Problems A blonde texts her husband on a cold winter’s morning: "Windows frozen, won’t open." Husband texts back: "Gently pour some lukewarm water over it and gently tap edges with hammer." Wife texts back 5 minutes later: "Computer really messed up now.”

What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashed?

Nothing.

Q: How do you know when an Asian broke into your house?

A: Your math homework is done, your computer is upgraded, and 2 hours later he’s still trying to back out of the driveway.

Why did Wi-Fi and the computer get married?

Because they had a connection

Yo mama so stupid, that when she heard about cookies on the internet she ate her computer

I started a band called 999 megabytes… we still haven’t gotten a gig

Bill Gates teaches a kindergarten class to count to ten. “1, 2, 3, 3.1, 95, 98, ME, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10.”

A man walks into a library and says to the librarian, “Do you have that book for men with small penises?”

The librarian looks on her computer and says, “I don’t know if it’s in yet.”

“Yeah, that’s the one!”

A wife and husband was setting up their computer and the husband makes the password my dick, but the wife fell on the floor laughing because the computer said the password was too short.

What happens when a computer thinks it knows better than a human? Ask Boeing.

I love the smell of my F5 key. – It’s very refreshing.

The reason steven sounds like a computer cuz he ate his usb

What does a shark and a computer have in common?

They both have megabites.

Some people are like a software update. When I see them I think, “Not now.”

What’s a aliens favorite computer key?

the space bar!

How did the computer get out of the house?

He used windows.

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