Crash

Anonymous

The oldest computer can be traced back to Adam and Eve. It was an apple but with extremely limited memory. Just 1 byte. And then everything crashed.

Connection

Busby

Why did Wi-Fi and the computer get married?

Because they had a connection

Puns

Jon

The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve. It was an Apple with limited memory, just one byte. And then everything crashed.

Wife

hartfelt.net

Window Problems A blonde texts her husband on a cold winter’s morning: "Windows frozen, won’t open." Husband texts back: "Gently pour some lukewarm water over it and gently tap edges with hammer." Wife texts back 5 minutes later: "Computer really messed up now.”

Crash

Anonymous

What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashed?

Nothing.

Bill

Anonymous

Bill Gates teaches a kindergarten class to count to ten. “1, 2, 3, 3.1, 95, 98, ME, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10.”

Girl

Anonymous

A computer science student is studying under a tree and another pulls up on a flashy new bike. The first student asks, “Where’d you get that?”

The student on the bike replies, “While I was studying outside, a beautiful girl pulled up on her bike. She took off all her clothes and said, “You can have anything you want.””

The first student responds, “Good choice! Her clothes probably wouldn’t have fit you.”

Baby

Anonymous

Arnold Schwarzenegger was asked if he wanted to upgrade to Windows 10. He replied, “I still love Vista, baby”.

Don

Anonymous

Where did the software developer go?! I don’t know, he ransomware!

Wife

P.... Jokes 101 v2

A wife and husband was setting up their computer and the husband makes the password my dick, but the wife fell on the floor laughing because the computer said the password was too short.

Windows

Return of Quagman

How did the computer get out of the house?

He used windows.

Puns

Hippity Hoppity Boi

I started a band called 999 megabytes… we still haven’t gotten a gig

Orphan

Anonymous

Why don’t orphans work as computer repair technicians?

Because they can’t find the motherboard

Difference

Anonymous

What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and the computer he’s hooked up to? – The computer runs.

Bill

Anonymous

Bill Gates teaches a kindergarten class to count to ten. “dos, 1, 2, 3, 3.1, 95, 98, ME, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 8.1, 10.”

House

Funny man

Q: How do you know when an Asian broke into your house?

A: Your math homework is done, your computer is upgraded, and 2 hours later he’s still trying to back out of the driveway.

Smell

Anonymous

I love the smell of my F5 key. – It’s very refreshing.

Stop

IteratedGaming

What did the processor say when it was being overclocked?

“Stop it! It hertz so much!”

Human

Anonymous

What happens when a computer thinks it knows better than a human? Ask Boeing.

Teacher

Anonymous

what do you call a creepy IT teacher…a PDF file

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