Weapon jokes
There was an enemy with a machine gun.
My commander said, "Un-arm the enemy."
So I ran over to the enemy and chopped his arms off.
Do I like playing Russian Roulette? Gun to the head, I'd have to say no.
What do eggs use in war? Eggk47s get my yolk this is really cracking me up!
They’d probably get shellshocked, wasn’t it all eggcellent? Ok, Ok, I’m headed for the egg-it.
Why did the new egg fell so good? It just got laid.
DB: I'm the only shotgun with more than 1 barrel!
Lancaster: Are you sure about that?
DB: huh?
Lancaster: I have 4 barrels!
DB: WHAT!?
Penta Barrel: I got 5!
DB: *insert becoming uncanny*
Dual Hexagon shotgun: I got 12!
The others: HOW!?
*and that's how an argument started.*
What's after R-P-G?
W.
AR-15: Who are you?
Musket: I'm you, but from another timeline.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special forces.
I barged into a Halloween party at my school with my air-soft AR-15!
I was so scary, EVERYONE ran away!
When the guy came in with a gun to rob the store, I said: "Hey, can I borrow that?"
He says "yes." Me, over here, walking to the cashier and saying: "Goodbye!" He screams: "Have mercy!"
I say: "No, not to you, to me. Say goodbye." He says: "No, don't shoot yourself!" It was too late.
What do Hitler's gas "shower" and guns have in common? They both kill someone.
The greatest playwright in history found he couldn’t use lances. He could only use "Shake-spears."
Confucius say: Never try win head-butting contest with mongoloid. You lose every time, and you only hurt yourself.
Unless he use Mongolian recurved bow... then you in trouble!
Me: I have an arrow in my head.
My friend: What's the point of that?
Me: Of the arrow?
Friend: No!
Me: Probably the flint.
What does a gas grenade and a baby have in common?
They both squeal when you throw them.
My life is like a grenade... I pull off the ring and, BOOM, it explodes!
"I will kill you with knife and gun, get ready, Explain Bear, stupid f***."
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special forces.
What does a terrorist get for Christmas?
A C4.
If Will Smith had a revolver and said, "Who fucked my wife?" Chris Rock would say, "You don't have enough bullets, mate."
Q: Why does Pewdiepie prefer knives over guns?
A: Because knives don't have barrels.