Short jokes
I get so many things stuck in my head, though, unfortunately none of them were a bullet.
Jack and Jill went up a hill to smoke a little leaf.
Jack got high and dropped his fly, and Jill said "Where’s The beef?"
Suicide is just self-defense. You're killing the person that tried to kill you.
Woman: "I want coffee, black."
Cop: *takes out gun* "WHERE?!"
I made a 3D game about a depressed, self-harming goth. It's mostly unskippable cutscenes.
Dr. Fauci would be surprised to know that R. Kelly didn't catch COVID-19.
But since COVID is 19, it's too old for him.
I once fought with a man in a wheelchair.
He couldn't stand a chance.
Helen Keller deaf-initely faked it!
What do you call a white guy with a 10 inch cock?
Asleep. Because that motherfucker's dreaming.
Someone who was working in the tower must've put their phone on plane mode.
What is an Emo's favorite way to Cosplay?
Dress up as a piñata!
"You the bomb!" No, "you the bomb!" A compliment in America, an argument in Afghanistan.
Yo mama so fat that when I banged her in the jacuzzi, there was a level 8 tsunami.
What makes sad people jump? A bridge.
It’s really hard to maintain a good body lately, unless you put it in a freezer.
Why aren't emos and trees friends? Because the tree leaves them hanging.
I either want to hang, stab, or shoot myself. I'm dying to choose.
We all know that Lincoln and Kennedy are the most open-minded presidents in the world.
Yo mama is so ugly, when she went trick or treating on Halloween 2016, the clowns thought she was their supreme leader.
I told my friend that if he ever wants 50% off something at a store, just to take me with him and scan my wrist.