Where did Lucy go during the bombing?
Everywhere.
Short Jokes
I have no father. Like if you relate.
What do you call shaving a crazy sheep? -- Shear madness.
What does the cannibal get after a one night stand?
Breakfast in bed!
What's the difference between a prostitute and a daredevil?
One has cunning stunts, whilst the other has a stunning...
My friend died from an allergic reaction. He gave me an EpiPen while he was dying, so now I have something to remember him from.
My kids are so ungrateful. I got them a new dishwasher and they just won't stop complaining about their mom.
Why do orphans bully people?
Because they can't get suspended.
Contact Parent _______
What does Madeleine McCann and my old Xbox have in common?
They both died with red rings.
The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.
How do you cover 12 holes with one hole?
Take a flute and shove it up your ass.
What's the second to last letter in the alphabet? Y. Cause I wanted to know.
Which Roman emperor was a mouse? Julius Cheeser!
The lice in your head are starting to concern over deforestation.
Tombstone engraving: "I TOLD you I was sick!"
What's the difference between property and women? At least property still retains some value after getting wrecked.
Why is Helen Keller's child blind too? She always fed it with a fork!
What's the last thing emos feel before they die? Rope burn.
What is Hitler's favorite book? "Hitler and the chamber of secrets."
What happened when the semicolon broke grammar laws?
It was given two consecutive sentences.
