Wrist jokes

What do you do when life gives you lemons? Slit your wrist and give a lemon a twist. 🙂💊💉

What's the benefit of taking a depressed kid to the store?

Scan the wrist and you might get a discount.

If I went to Walmart, I would be able to scan my own wrists because they're barcodes too.

Me running after slapping the emo kid's wrist and saying, "I like ya cut g."

Next time at Walmart, I'm going to scan my wrist. They are basically barcodes.

I'm going to draw a picture. A picture with a twist. I'll draw it with a razor blade. I'll draw it on my wrist.

Tomorrow is Christmas, and I'm giving myself a present that I can't wait to open. It's my wrist. (Yes, this was inspired by a Fall Out Boy song.)

What’s the difference between a barcode and Rachel Sutherland’s wrist?

Nothing, they both get scanned for a fresh new pack of razor blades.

I heard the man who invented Autocorrect died; may he rest in peace.

What’s the difference between my lawn and my wrists?

Nothing, I cut both of them.

Instead of Edward Scissorhands, I’m Edwardscissor wrists.

I was in school yesterday and I saw this emo kid with a new cut, so I said, "I like ya cut g." And I slapped him. I don't know why I got in so much trouble. All I did was slap his wrist.

I told my friend that if he ever wants 50% off something at a store, just to take me with him and scan my wrist.

Emo girls be like: How much am I worth...

Girl, scan the code on your wrist!

Once my friend saw my wrist, slapped it and said "I like ya cuts, G!"

Someone asked me what the lines on my wrist were from. I answered, "My cat has OCD."

You're the wrist-slitting simulator champion!

I slit my wrists.

I saw this girl with blue hair and slapped her wrist and said, “NICE CUT G!”

What does grass and Rachel Sutherland’s wrists have in common: nothing, they both get cut.