Man jokes
A Chinese man and an Indian man are in a car. Who’s driving?
A woman.
What do you get when you cross a Chinese and an Indian man?
A car thief who can't drive.
Why can't Stephen Hawking win any arguments?
Because he can't stand up for himself.
I can't not believe you stupid fucks. This isn't funny. Just like a bunch of cunts not to believe there is nothing can't do.
BTW what do you call a manly woman's cunt? Nothing. Who gives a fuck?
I was at work and a few fat women came up to me and asked for some help.
Later that week, I ran into them on the dance floor. One of them asked me if I wanted to dance. I told her no. The other asked me if I knew what was cracking. I calmly said, "The floor."
What do you call a man in a wheelchair with no legs?
Geo dude.
What's one thing your dad shares with black men? Your sister.
God creates dog.
God: "You are man's best friend."
Dog: "That's pretty sexist."
God: "No, man as in- You know what, FUCK IT! You can't speak!"
Dog: "....."
God: "And chocolate kills you!"
Dog: "🐶"
Why did the man miss the funeral?
He wasn’t a mourning person.
What do you call a Black man having a seizure?
Chocolate shake.
What did John Cena say to Ray Charles?
Hey, man.
Why do many New Yorkers like watching Spider-Man?
Because he’s always on the webcast.
I asked a man for ten dollars for a cup of coffee. The man said coffee was only a quarter. I told him I was putting all my begs in one ask-it.
A man from Brooklyn is arguing with an Englishman. He says things like,
"It's an elevator, not a lift!"
and
"It's a bathroom! Not 'washroom'!"
He keeps going on until the Englishman says,
"Hey wanker, it's a school, not a god damned shooting range."
A man walked into a bar. No wait, a horse,
A man walked into a horse.
Confucius say, "Man who bite electric wire get shocking experience!"
What was the first man made out of? Adams! (Atoms)
Why did the man die of the actor's performance?
The performance was unbeLIVEable!
Three guys walk into a room where a man is sitting with an assortment of foods on his plate because it's lunchtime. The guys ask the man to do a favor, and he says, "Sorry guys, I have a lot on my plate!"
A police officer pulls a man over. "Hands in the air!"
The man said, "Okay."