Man jokes

Where has God existed outside of a man's awareness of him?

Son: Mom, what's dark humor?

Mom: Do you see that man without arms over there? Tell him to clap.

Son: Mom, I'm blind.

Mom: Exactly.

What hates men but would have no life without men?

A triggered feminist.

How can a gay man that is unemployed be productive in the workplace?

Give a blowjob to other gay men in the workplace for money.

A man saw a kid on the road, and the man asked: "Where are your parents?" The boy: "..." The man left the adoption center.

When you see someone with a double chin that’s sad:

Hey come on, man, keep your chin up. Wait, which one?

What do call six gay men going in a war?

Rainbow Six Siege.

Why did the mailman die?

Because everyone dies.

What's a rock band that has four men that don't sing?

Mount Rushmore.

Iron Man: Where are you from?

Thor: Asgard.

Iron Man: Do you mean ass guard?

What's an orphan's favorite movie?

"Spider-Man: Homecoming."

Why don't gay men perform anilingus on each other in Greece?

Because anilingus is against the law in Greece.

When it's cold outside, men can cut ice in three places.

Two men walk into a bar. You’d think at least one of them would have ducked.

In the Middle Ages it was illegal for a blind man to become a king.

I mean, I don't see why not.

A Japanese man goes to the dentist. After being there for a while, the dentist asks, "How often do you floss your teeth?"

The Jap said, "After every meal." When they finish up, the dentist turns to him and says, "You need to floss your eyes more. I can still see them."

What do you call two old men drooling in their wheelchairs?

The 2028 US election.

There are three people in a plane that is about to crash: Trump, Obama, and a nine-year-old girl, but only two parachutes. Obama says, "Oh my, I need one. I need to protect my family," so he jumps off! Trump says, "Oh, I am the smartest man in the world. I must take it," so he jumps off. The nine-year-old girl says, "Welp, I guess he took my school backpack" :) so she leaves the plane! What a good ending.

A fat man coming in the store.

Waiter: Oh god, not again :|

Fat man: Hi, I would like three fries and 19 burgers.

Waiter: Sorry sir, you will get the owner's store out of stock on food. Can I get you a salad instead?

Fat man: Oh sorry, but I'm the owner, and I have a lot of stocks. For the record, you should get yourself my order. You're skinny af, girl. You trying to be a stick or something?

Why did the Polish Roman Catholic priest remove zippers from the pants of gay men in the LGBT community?

Because he lost his key to his house and he was desperate to get back inside of his house and he thought that one of keys to their zippers would be able to unlock the door of his house.