Man jokes
What did God say when he made the first black man?
"Crap, I burnt one!"
Your hairline is so bad man, I gave your doctor a breathalyzer.
Why did the chicken cross the road to get to the gay man's house?
Knock knock, it's the gay man. There's a chicken at my house.
When I was teaching my dog tricks, a Chinese man came to me and asked, "Why were you playing with your food?"
"What do you give a man that has everything? Penicillin."
I saw a black man riding a brand new bike, so I went home to check my garage. It’s all good because I still saw mine still chained to the floor begging for food.
I like my men like I like my coffee: black and hot.
Why do New Yorkers get what Spider-Man is saying?
Because he always makes spider-sense.
A drunk walks into a bar and says, "All lawyers are assholes!" A guy at the other end of the bar says, "I resent that!" The drunk says, "Why, are you a lawyer?" and the other guy says, "No, I'm an asshole!"
A pirate walks into a bar with a wheel hanging down his pants.
A guy walks by and says, "Pardon me sir, but you've got a wheel hanging down your pants." The pirate responds, "I know. It's driving me nuts!"
What do you call a man with no hands? Clapless.
Why are most firefighters men? Because they like to find hot places and leave them wet.
The ice cream man tried to murder me today.
A person laughs every day.
"Man," they say, "I'm glad I'm not an egg, otherwise I'd just CRACK MYseLf uP!"
Okay, long story fast, I walked to GameStop in my house, in the kitchen, by Walmart, to a BTS Squid Game concert, and Drake and Pablo were there for her labor in the Cowboys stadium by Nike, so I bought a pencil from a dead alive man. He said "ZOO WEE MAMA." So yeah.
Women be like I don't wear makeup for men.
Then get mad when a man doesn't compliment her in her makeup!
Three men walk into heaven at the same time. They all live in the same city. God asks the first man, "How did you die?" The man says, "I have a heart condition, and I've been suspecting my wife of cheating for some time. Anyway, I get home from work and I see my wife on the bed and a man hanging off the balcony. I get so mad and stomp on the guy's fingers! He falls into a bush, so I throw a refrigerator on him." God asks the next man, "How did you die?" The man says, "I was cleaning the windows, and then this crazy man starts stomping on my fingers! Luckily, I fall safely in a bush! But then a refrigerator falls on me!" God asks the third man, and he says, "I was the one in the fridge!"
Men: "I like dogs."
Women: "I like cats."
Chinese: "Food is food."
Did you hear about the man who jumped off a bridge in France? He was in Seine.
Iron Man dies.