Cunt

Cunt Jokes

Yeast infection

Why did God invent yeast infections? So women would know what it's like to live with an irritating cunt too.

Grandpa

I will always remember my grandpa's last words: "Stop shaking the ladder, you cunt!"

Midget

I asked my midget neighbor if he wanted a lift. He told me to "Fuck off!!!" I thought, what a cheeky cunt and zipped my backpack up and walked away.

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  • Tampon

    What did one tampon say to the other tampon when they walked by each other on the street?

    Nothing. They were both stuck up cunts!

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  • Last Word

    I'll never forget my grandfather's last words: "STOP SHAKING THE LADDER, YOU LITTLE CUNT!"

    Note

    Note to self.

    When baking for the holidays, don't Google "creampies".

    Google "cream pie recipes".

    Tampon

    Q: There were two tampons walking down the road the other day. Guess what they said to each other?

    A: Nothing, 'cause they're both stuck-up cunts.

    Oyster

    What's worse than sucking a dozen raw oysters out of your grandmother's cunt?

    Putting in 12 and sucking out 13.

    Field

    What do ya call a legless prostitute in a strawberry field?

    A jammy cunt.

    Woman

    What do you call that useless piece of skin that goes all the way around a pussy?

    A woman!

    Cock

    A cock really has a sad life. He's hairs a mess, his neighbor's an arsehole, his best friend is a cunt.

    Hand

    What's strong enough for a man but made for a woman?

    The back of my hand.