Cunt jokes
Note to self.
When baking for the holidays, don't Google "creampies".
Google "cream pie recipes".
I'll never forget my grandfather's last words: "STOP SHAKING THE LADDER, YOU LITTLE CUNT!"
Why did God invent yeast infections? So women would know what it's like to live with an irritating cunt too.
I will always remember my grandpa's last words: "Stop shaking the ladder, you cunt!"
I asked my midget neighbor if he wanted a lift. He told me to "Fuck off!!!" I thought, what a cheeky cunt and zipped my backpack up and walked away.
Al Fayed’s son arrives at heaven’s gates and sees his driver.
He shouts “you stupid cunt!”
The driver says, “Watch, Boss?”
Dodi replies...:
“I said I WANT TO FUCK DI IN THE TUNNEL NOT FUCKING DIE IN THE TUNNEL!”
A cock really has a sad life. He's hairs a mess, his neighbor's an arsehole, his best friend is a cunt.
Q: There were two tampons walking down the road the other day. Guess what they said to each other?
A: Nothing, 'cause they're both stuck-up cunts.
If you eat her out on her period, does that make you Cunt Dracula?
Two cunts were walking down the street.
One was doing calculus, and the other one says, "Imagine me, a stupid cunt that can talk...."
I asked to borrow a book from the library. It was titled "Suicide in Ten Easy Steps." The cunt just stood and said, "Cheeky bastard, you won't bring it back!"
There's no "I" in team, but there is a "U" in cunt.
What did one tampon say to the other tampon when they walked by each other on the street?
Nothing. They were both stuck up cunts!
I used to be into necrophilia. Until that rotten cunt split on me...
What is the difference between a hoe's birth Daddy and her pimp Daddy?
The first daddy plants the seed in a cunt, and the second reaps the harvest from the cunt.
Ok, now I'm not good at telling jokes, but this one is not too bad. One cunt said to another cunt, "Do you get cold at night?"
"Fuck no, cunt," the first cunt said, "Why?"
"I have a built-in set of vertical curtains to keep the cold out, cunt!" xx
Why are Deepika Amar's jokes so shit? Because he is a smelly cunt.
What do you call that useless piece of skin that goes all the way around a pussy?
A woman!
How did the necrophiliac get caught?
Some rotten cunt split on him....
What's worse than sucking a dozen raw oysters out of your grandmother's cunt?
Putting in 12 and sucking out 13.