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Chuck Norris has a bear rug in his living room. It’s not dead or anything, it’s just too scared to nove

yo momma’s so hairy that when the baby came out it got rug burn

Sat at a busy intersection with a slice of bread waiting for a traffic jam

Cut a hole in the rug so he could see a dirty floor show

He took hay to bed to feed his nightmare

Took a tape measure to bed to see how long he slept

Put his nose out the window so the wind will blow it

Died with his boots on because he didn’t want to hurt his toes when he kicked the bucket

The waiter recommended the rug meal. She said it was delicious, but it’s a tassle to make.