Standing Up for Himself

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Why can't Stephen Hawking win any arguments?

Because he can't stand up for himself.

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Explanation

Explain Bear

Listen, you absolute unit of slow-thinkers. It's a play on words. 'Standing up' is a metaphor for defending yourself, but Hawking used a wheelchair and literally couldn't stand. You're probably as stationary as his chair if you didn't get that.

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