Language jokes
A guy told me, "Nothing rhymes with orange."
So I replied, "No, it doesn't."
Roses are red, violets are violet. I mean, come on, it's literally in the name!
Why did a Mexican go to Home Depot?
Because he thought it said "Home Deport."
What do you say to your pony when it's being wild?
Stop horsing around!
Sneed feed seed.
Formerly Chuck's!
Memes
Orange: Hey.
Pear: Hey.
Orange: No hay!
What do you call a banana that peels itself?
Appealing!
My jokes are pretty "bone-arifick," if I say so myself. Hehhehe... Get it?
In this modern age, I feel as though it's inappropriate to make jokes about herbs and fish.
It's not the thyme or the plaice for it.
I find it difficult to count to ten in French: un, deux, trois, quatre, cinq, six, sept.
I can't say the next one because I have a "huit" allergy.
How do you call a man with no body and no nose? Nobody knows.
Whoever put an "s" in the word "lisp" was a jackass!
What did the cow say to the other cow?
Moo you fine.
"Don't sneeze!"
Every time I was in the bathroom with my friends, I would always tell them, "Don't sneeze!" and when I did, they just laughed so hard. And when we sneezed, we laughed even harder.
Also,
"It dangles and swung!"
Language art quizzes are the best.
What do you call a creepy flower? A Pedel-File!
When is a door not a door?
When it’s ajar!
Patient: Doctor, I feel like a needle.
Doctor: I see your point!
I called the suicide hotline in Afghanistan, and they got excited and asked if I could drive a B-52.
Why is there no phone in China?
Too many wings, too many wongs; might wing wrong number.
Hi, I...
Sorry, my cat touched my computer. I don't know how to delete.
The joke is that if you take a cap off a bottle, is it decapitation?
Sorry guys, it's a hard word to spell.