Language jokes
What do Ligma and Bofa have in common?
They both ride on my dick.
A B C D E F G H I see a bitch in front of me.
How do you talk to giants? Using big words.
Me: What’s the definition of “ignorance”?
Friend: Don’t know?
Me: U STUPID!
How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? If you woodchuck on the world with that, you have a really deep in, and he says goodbye. When he says goodbye, you're like, "if you."
Memes
Uremn es abarancin yngnumma gety asuma qshi tun?
A student asked a teacher, "How do you pronounce this word? It's spelled A-L-L-I-E-D."
The teacher was about to answer, but then the student said, "Actually, I know how to pronounce it. I lied!" (allied)
Eschew obfuscation.
What do you call a very rude bird? A mockingbird.
Hana?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
I did app.
I did app who?
You did a poo.
What's the smartest insect? A spelling bee!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Abby.
Abby who?
Abby C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z.
Wanna hear a couple of short jokes and a long joke?
Joke,
Joke,
Jooooooooooooooke.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Leaf. “Leaf” who? Leaf my house, or else you will regret it. You don’t live here, you dumb idiot! ?!
How to harass? Say it out loud but slowly. Split that word into, and it sounds like "her ass."
Mary: If you born pikin (child) inside shop, wetin you go call that pikin (child)?
Mike: The pikin (child) go bear Bishop.
How do you say "fish" without the "i"?
Fsh
Knock, knock.
You suck my iron with you and mommy.
What do you call a suspicious dog?
A sussy bark-er.