Language jokes
A dog talks to another dog and says,
"Wow, you're a hot dog!"
Me: What's the fifth month of the year?
Friend: May.
Me: May deez nuts fit in your mouth?
What does lmao mean? Laughing miles.
Spell "I cup."
I C U P
How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? If you woodchuck on the world with that, you have a really deep in, and he says goodbye. When he says goodbye, you're like, "if you."
What do you call a very rude bird? A mockingbird.
Uremn es abarancin yngnumma gety asuma qshi tun?
A student asked a teacher, "How do you pronounce this word? It's spelled A-L-L-I-E-D."
The teacher was about to answer, but then the student said, "Actually, I know how to pronounce it. I lied!" (allied)
What do Ligma and Bofa have in common?
They both ride on my dick.
Innit.
What do you call a questioning Constanta?
Curious George.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Smell mop.
Smell mop who?
It is a known fact that you cannot say “harassment” without “her ass.”
I guess you could say, “harassment something.”
Do you know Wildee?
What's that?
Will deez nuts fit into your mouth?
A dog walked into a tavern and said, “I can’t see a thing. I’ll open this one.” The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life (and has been lost), but the words remain.
Do you know what SAWCON is?
SAWCON deez nuts.
Sneed feed seed.
Formerly Chuck's!
Hana?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
I did app.
I did app who?
You did a poo.
Why was eight afraid of seven? Because 7, 8, 9!