Lisp jokes
If someone with a lisp dropped a hammer on their foot, would they be Thor?
Whoever put an "s" in the word "lisp" was a jackass!
What do you call a rude math teacher with a lisp?
A mathive dick.
What do you call a Titan who can't swim?
Titanic!
Imagine the Titanic with a lisp. It would be unthinkable. My version is imagine the Titanic with a lisp, it would be unsinkable.
What did the front half of the Titanic say to the other half when it hit the iceberg? I'm breaking up with you.
When your cousin who has a lisp died from the impostor in Among Us,
"THE IMPASTA KILLED MEH!"
Daughter: Dad.
Dad: Yes honey?
Daughter: I'm lesbian.
Dad: Ok.
Daughter 2: Dad.
Dad: Yes?
Daughter 2: I'm lesbian too.
Dad: God, does anyone like boys around here?
Son: I do...
Asked my dad what LGBT stands for.
He started with "Lettuce? Bacon. Tomato. What's the 'g' for?" Obviously, I had to reply with "Garnish."
Russian, American, and Polish stood by the lake shore.
Russian ran ahead to dive and yelled "vodka" and the lake changed into vodka.
Polish ran ahead to dive and yelled "beer" and the lake changed into beer.
American ran to dive, slipped, and said, "oh shit."
Teacher tests Little Johnny, “OK, Johnny, create a sentence which starts with ‘I’.”
Little Johnny confidently starts, “I is...”
Teacher snaps, “No, Little Johnny. You must always say, ‘I am’.”
Little Johnny sighs, “Yes ma’am. ‘I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.’”
Teacher: Okay class, what's a word that begins with A?
Student: Apple!
Teacher: Good! What's a word beginning with B?
Student:....Bitch...