Vocabulary jokes
What is the longest word in the English Dictionary? "Smiles," because there is a mile between the first letter and the last.
One day Little Johnny's class is having an English lesson. The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word intelligent in a sentence?" Little Mary says, "The teacher is very intelligent." The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word fashionable in a sentence?" Little Suzie says, "They are very fashionable." The teacher says, "Johnny, why don't you have a go? Use the word dictate in a sentence." Johnny thinks for a moment and then says, "Last night I heard Daddy asking Mommy 'Darling how does my dictate'"
It’s important to establish a good vocabulary. If I had known the difference between the words “antidote” and “anecdote,” one of my best friends would still be alive.
What starts with "E" and ends with "G"?
Everything.
What’s the difference between a hoe and a rooster?
A rooster says, "Cock-a-doodle-doo," and a hoe says, "Any cock will do."
Memes
Why does it take so long for the pirates to learn the alphabet?
Because they spend years on C! Pirate: A, B, sea?
Why isn’t the word “orphan” spelled with an “f” instead of “ph?” Because that “f” stands for “family,” and the word “orphan” doesn’t have a family.
What does an orphan's life and a pseudoword have in common?
They both have no meaning.
This is a true fact, the letter "F" in orphan stands for family.
How do you call a cute door?
A-door-able.
How do you say "nose" in Spanish?
hmm.... No sé.
I heard an unusual word the other day: "Opaque."
Unfortunately, what it means is unclear.
What starts with "N" and ends with "G?"
Nothing.
What are the 3 shortest words in the English language?
“Is It In?”
Spell "IOUT", no space.
Yesterday I asked my friend, "What is a fish without eyes?"
They replied, "I don’t know."
I said, "Fsh."
Why did the rapper go to school?
To improve his FLOW-CABULARY!
Why did the rapper bring a dictionary to the rap battle?
For WORDPLAY!
A guy told me, "Nothing rhymes with orange."
So I replied, "No, it doesn't."
What starts with F and ends with CK?
Firetruck.