Wordplay jokes
Are you a rope? Because I wanna hang with you.
What's a depressed person's favorite drink?
Depresso expresso.
JK, bleach.
What's the difference between Chris Brown and Santa?
Santa stops at 3 hoes.
Santa was asked to describe Mrs. Claus in three words. His response was, "Ho ho ho."
911 jokes usually go over my head.
Then it hits me.
Did you know the letter "F" in orphan stands for family?
What's a pedophile's favorite type of garden?
A kindergarden.
I named my dog 5-Miles, so now I tell people, "I walk 5-Miles every day."
Officer sees a man and he is seeing he is having trouble walking, so he asked him, "Sir, are you drunk?" The man responds, "No, sir, I'm not drunk." So the officer asks, "How high are you?" And the man responds, "No sir, it's 'Hi, how are you?'"
What's a suicidal person's favorite game?
Hangman.
What do you call a man off the ground?
Hanged.
What do you call 100 rabbits walking backwards?
A receding hare line.
What do you call an Asian who can't hear?
Wha U Sai
Me: If a skinny person goes skinny dipping, then what do fat people do?
My friend: Chunky dunks.
What's the most played game in Africa? Hunger Games.
What's a similarity between a cliff hanger and nooses?
They both leave you hanging.
What’s the difference between a politician and a flying pig? -- The letter F.
Two windmills are standing in a field and one asks the other, "What kind of music do you like?" The other says, "I'm a big metal fan."
What do you call an ice skating dwarf?
A midget spinner.
What's a depressed person's least favorite type of cereal?
LIFE.