Wordplay jokes
What's a depressed person's favorite drink?
Depresso expresso.
JK, bleach.
How do pigs kill themselves?
They commit Kermit-cide.
Why did the lettuce win the race?
Saw (DYM 69).
Doin' (DYM 63)?
What do you call a group of people who are interested in Nintendo monkeys?
A Kongregation.
What is the difference between a man peering through the keyhole and a woman in the bath?
One is rude and nosy; the other is nude and Rosy.
Wow, all these jokes are humerus!
What do you call an autistic person who is a dumbass? A dumbism.
Suck my cheetah.
Knock, knock.
Who is there?
Bear.
Bear who?
Bear bum!
What do you call two guys fighting over a slut?
Tug of whore.
Why did the duck walk across the road? I lost my pecker!
What do you call a Vietnamese antivirus scanner?
An-Thi-cho-rho-na.
Why did the rapper bring a dictionary to the party?
So he could drop some WORDPLAY.
Your mom is so fat, she starts the alphabet with the letter "o" for obesity, hahaha!
A panda goes to see a hooker. He goes down on her, he mates with her, he ejaculates and then he attempts to walk away.
The working girl asks, "Aren't you going to pay me?"
She opens the dictionary to "Prostitute: One who sells sexual companionship for money."
The panda picks up the dictionary and turns to the definition "Panda: A marsupial who eats, roots, shoots, and leaves."
It's ice to see you.
If there's a lieutenant, shouldn't there be a righttenant too? 🤔
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they have no home to run to.