Flower Jokes

Butter
in Depression

a girl and her brother are walking in their garden POV:Brother. Sister:Why are you cutting those flowers?

Brother; because their beautiful!

Sister:I thought you said you cut yourself because you aren’t.

Brother:…

3
Anonymous
in Kid

What flowers are on your face

dev

What did the big flower say to the little flower? Hi, Bud

Anonymous
in Clown

If i send a clown to deliver flowers to my wife…

…is that a romantic jester

Asswald

A cop sees an old woman carrying two large sacks. One of the sacks has a hole and is leaking 20 dollar bills.

The cop asks the woman, “Where did an old lady like you get all of that money?”

She replies, “Well, there’s a golf course behind my house and when golfers need to go to the bathroom, they stick their penis through a hole in my fence and pee into my yard. It became a problem because it kills the flowers.”

The cop asks, “So what did you do about it?”

The old lady says, “I get my hedge clippers and I wait behind the fence. When a golfer sticks his penis through the fence, I grab ahold of it and shout GIVE ME $20 OR IT COMES CLEAN OFF!”

“That seems fair enough,” the cop says, “so what’s in the other sack?”

The old lady replies with, “Not everyone pays…”

BatmanTehNoob
in Titanic

What’s Jack’s Favorite Flower. A Rose.

Midget Widget
in Puns

The flower made a phone call and became cauliflower

Depressed_Onion_Cutting_Itself
in Depression

You know what flowers and depressed people have in common?

Both end up getting cut.

dev

Doctor: I’ve got good news and bad news Patient: What’s the good news? Doctor: I’ve got u flowers Patient: Awww, What’s the bad news? Doctor: They’re for your grave

Lilly 🐟 🦋 🐟
in Orphanage

What’s an orphans favourite flower? Self-raising flour

Anonymous
in Puns

A Blond and her Brunette friend where chatting about their boyfriends; the brunette goes on and on about how dirty her boyfriend is with her. To not be outdone the blond retort’s. Thats nothing once we we’re in the kitchen I can’t believe I didn’t see it coming one minute I turned and He just got it all on my face it was so thick and hard! it covered my mouth, my nose,my shoulders, and eyes it even got in my hair; and when i looked up at him all he could say was whoops the Flower went everywhere!

Germaine Smidt
in Orphan

Want to know difference between an orphan and a flower??

Flowers get picked.

Anonymous
in Shooter

What’s a school shooter’s favourite flower?

Columbine

Sad
in Orphan

What is an orphans favourite flower? Self raising 😂

Anonymouse

A teenage guy is taking a girl to a dance. First, he goes to buy her flowers. But there’s a really long line at the florist. Finally, he buys them. Then, he goes to rent a tux, but there’s a really long line for that too. After a few hours, he gets the tux. That night, he picks up the girl and they go to the school for the dance. There’s a long line to get in that goes halfway around the school. A while later, they finally get in. They dance and talk for a while, then the guy gets thirsty, so he goes over to the table to get punch. There is no punch line.

real cg5
in Minecraft

what flowers do orphans use… self raising flower

Squirrel
in Nut

what did the flower say to the crazy penut?

Ur going nuts boii get back on yo’ plant ur to nuts for me

Anonymous
in Orphanage

What is the difference between a flower and a orphan

A flower gets picked

JJAnonymous
in Orphan

What’s an orphans favourite snake self raising flower

Ethan

What do you call a creepy flower? A Pedel-File!