Jesus

Anonymous

Jack and Molly are sitting in school one day. Molly is asleep when the teacher asks her a question, “Molly, who created Heaven and Earth?”

Jack sees Molly is sleeping and quickly pokes her with a sharp pencil.

“Jesus Christ almighty!” shouts Molly.

“Correct,” says the teacher.

The next day the teacher asks, “Molly, who created Heaven and Earth?”

Molly is again asleep and is poked by Jack’s pencil.

“Jesus Christ almighty!” she shouts.

“Correct again,” says the teacher.

The next day, for a 3rd time, Molly is asleep.

This time the teacher asks her, “What did Eve say to Adam when she had so many children?”

Jack pokes Molly with the pencil again, and this time Molly screams “If you stick that thing in me one more time I’m going to crack it in half!”

Puns

Broken pencil

Knock knock. Who’s there? Broken pencil. Broken pencil who? Never mind, it was pointless!

Puns

Anonymous

I’ve decided to marry a pencil. I can’t wait to introduce my parents to my bride 2B.

Depression

Yeet

What’s the similarity between a broken pencil and my life? They’re both pointless.

Depression

H i

My life is like a broken pencil, it’s pointless.

School

Smart one kendal

What do you call a broken pencil never mind it’s pointless!!

Puns

809killersYT

I GOT a job as a pencil sharpener I would tell you about it but you wouldn’t get the point.

Puns

Anonymous

Why was the blunt pencil bad at making speeches? It never had a point.

Little Johnny

Anonymous

Little Johnny was sitting in class, and he was behind a girl called Sally. The teacher asks the class, “Who created the Earth?” And Little Johnny pokes Sally in the back with his sharpened pencil, and she jumps and says, “MY GOD!” And the teacher says, “Yes, Sally, God did create the Earth.” Sally sits down. Then, the teacher asks, “Where do you go after you live a good life?” and Little Johnny pokes Sally again, and she jumps up and says, “HEAVENS TO BETSY!” And the teacher says, “Yes Sally. You will go to heaven after you live a good life.” Sally sits down, knowing full well Little Johnny was poking her. Sally gave Little Johnny an angry glare, and she turns around. And then, the teacher asks the class, “What did Eve say to Adam after their 77th child?” and Little Johnny pokes Sally HARDER this time in the back, and Sally jumps, turns around and says, “If you stick that thing in me one more time, I swear I’m gonna lose it!” And the teacher faints.

Toilet

Mini Marshmallow

Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a pencil

Puns

King Oof

I tried writing with a dull pencil the other day, but there was no point.

Cow

Evie 🥰🥰

So in class they were learning about where food comes from: Teacher- so kids where does bacon come from? Student- PIGS Teacher- correct where does mutton come from? Student- SHEEP teacher- and finally here’s your homework- student- IK where that comes from! A FAT COW! 😂😂

Puns

Loldogo

To Write With a Broken Pencil Is pointless

Difference

nibba

Whats the difference between a feminist and a pencil? One of them has a POINT:)

Puns

Anonymous

My brother wanted to sharpen my pencil. I told him he had a point.

Puns

Anonymous

I could tell you the one about the broken pencil… but it’s pointless

Puns

J. P. Galli

You can lead a horse to water, but a pencil must be lead.

Puns

Ethan

I was going to tell you a joke about a pencil but now it is pointless

Puns

Ben

Playing a game called 7-up. Student- why can’t I use a pencil to tap their fingers? Teacher- it’s cheating! Student- No! it’s the object of the game.

Paper

Jordan

What did the pencil say to the piece of paper? You FLAT

What did the spoon say to the pancake batter? You THICK

Loading...