Why can't dinosaurs talk?
Because they are all dead.
Language Jokes
What is the German word for constipation? Farfrompoopin.
A man is meeting a client in Japan, but arrives a day early. When night hit, he went out with a prostitute. They're having sex, but the prostitute kept shouting "Fuji, Fuji, Fuji!", so the man thinks he's doing a good job. The next day, the man meets his client and they go golfing, and the client gets a hole in one. The man praises him by going "Fuji, Fuji, Fuji!". His client turns around confused and says, "What do you mean wrong hole!?"
What is a gay person's favorite book?
The dictionary.
Why can't two Asians make a white baby?
Because two wongs don't make a white.
Little Johnny was late to school one day, and Miss Brown asks, "Johnny, how come you're late to class?" And Johnny says, "Miss, you wouldn't believe it. The farmer's bull got out and started fucking the white cow." Miss Brown said, "Johnny, don't use that word. Next time you want to say that, use the word 'surprised'."
The next day Johnny was late again, and Miss Brown said, "Johnny, why are you late?" And Johnny replied, "Miss, you wouldn't believe it. The farmer's bull got out and 'surprised' the white cow." Miss Brown said, "That's much better, Johnny." And Johnny said, "Yeah, walked straight passed it and started fucking the black one."
Two cats called "1,2,3" & "un, deux, trois" had a swimming race across the channel.
1,2,3 cat won because un, deux, trois cat sank!
Spell Mississippi.
M-I-S-S-I-P-P~
Haha you said pp.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
No one.
No one who?
...
What kind of birds stick together?
Vel-crows.
"Have a nice day" and "enjoy the next 24 hours" mean the same thing, but one sounds like a threat.
Sister: I don't want to do it, but...
Me: No more butts! Butts are too yuck to be in this sentence.
A French Sans would greet you with the "o bone-jour".
What's the difference between dad jokes and bad jokes?
The letter b.
A girl tried 77.34 (77.34) times to think of a word opposite of BYE. Then her brother divided the word BYE. 77.34 divided by 100. TRY IT!!
The worst joke ever.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9.
Why was 9 thankful to 6? Because 6 8 7 2.
You couldn't spit out a good sentence, even if you ate a bowl of alphabet soup.
How are peppers 🌶 so nosey?
They get jalapeño business.
Why don’t Asians use phones?
Cuz they wing da wrong number!!!
A pun enters the room and kills ten people.
Pun in, ten dead.
