What did the Asian people name their retarded son?
Sum Ting Wong.
A man dies, and his friend is invited to his funeral.
This friend asks his wife, "Can I say a word?"
"Of course," she says.
The man stands up and says, "Plethora!"
The man's wife says, "Thanks, it means a lot!"
8008135 is my favorite number.
The worst ratio is 6:9.
And last but not least, "Why was six afraid of seven?" Seven eight nine. But why was six with nine? Because when you put them together, you get 69. But why was six mad at nine? Because Nine eight six, too.
How can you make a woman scream your name when you have sex with her?
Change your name to "Rape."
I met an African girl the other night, we spoke for hours.
We just clicked.
Americans: I will cook the pizza.
Italians: I cooka de pizza!
What’s the Difference Between a Cat and a Comma?
One has claws at the end of its paws, and the other is a pause at the end of a clause.
I have a joke about paper. It's tearable.
An ICE agent tells a Mexican that he can get his green card if he can use green, pink, and yellow correctly in a sentence. The Mexican thinks for a minute and says, "My phone goes green, green, and I pink it up and say yellow."
Which animal has the largest chest? A Z-bra.
What did the man say to the deaf kid? He said...
What do you get when you cross a dick and a potato?
A dictator.
Knock knock.
"Who's there?"
Boo.
"Boo who?"
It's just a joke, no need to cry!
Q. What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A. A gummy bear.
The F in orphan stands for family.
Wait, there is no F. (F)
If you take a cap off a bottle, is it decapitation?
Person: Why? You: No.
"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Dishes."
"Dishes who?"
"Dishes a bad joke."
What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals?
Philipe Philope.
What’s the point in a cow going to the cinema? To be a-moo-sed!
