Language jokes

What kind of birds stick together?

Vel-crows.

You couldn't spit out a good sentence, even if you ate a bowl of alphabet soup.

The worst joke ever.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9.

Why was 9 thankful to 6? Because 6 8 7 2.

How are peppers 🌶 so nosey?

They get jalapeño business.

Why don’t Asians use phones?

Cuz they wing da wrong number!!!

A pun enters the room and kills ten people.

Pun in, ten dead.

What did the Asian people name their retarded son?

Sum Ting Wong.

A Mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "uno, dos..." *poof* ... He disappeared without a tres.

I am only familiar with 25 letters of the alphabet.

I don't know why.

One day, two Chinese people with broken English go to America. When they arrive, they go to a small place to eat. When they look at the menu, they see "hot dog," but since their English is bad, they think it's literally a roasted dog and order it. When it comes back, they're both surprised, and one of them asks,

"What part of the dog did you get?"

A man dies, and his friend is invited to his funeral.

This friend asks his wife, "Can I say a word?"

"Of course," she says.

The man stands up and says, "Plethora!"

The man's wife says, "Thanks, it means a lot!"

Justin: Hey.

Josh: Hey man.

Justin: Why only "man"?

Josh: It feels weird saying the r a c e y names.

Justin: I don't mind.

Josh: Okay, S L A V E.

Justin: Oh no, not T H A T one!

8008135 is my favorite number.

The worst ratio is 6:9.

And last but not least, "Why was six afraid of seven?" Seven eight nine. But why was six with nine? Because when you put them together, you get 69. But why was six mad at nine? Because Nine eight six, too.

How can you make a woman scream your name when you have sex with her?

Change your name to "Rape."

Is it possible to stutter in sign language?

Yes, it’s called Parkinson’s.

I have a joke about paper. It's tearable.

If a bike is also called a bicycle, then what is a test also called?

A tEsTiClE!

What’s the Difference Between a Cat and a Comma?

One has claws at the end of its paws, and the other is a pause at the end of a clause.

What do you call a dear with no eyes?

I have no eye deer!

What did the man say to the deaf kid? He said...