Some people think prison is one word, but to robbers, it's a whole sentence.
If being ugly was a crime, you would get a life sentence.
The judge asked me "How does 5 to 10 years sound?" I said "Sexy."
What is a prisoner's favorite punctuation?
A period.
Why?
Because it marks the end of a sentence.
Teacher:"What is the opposite of the following sentence: 'Children in the dark make mistakes'?" Student:"Mistakes in the dark make children"
A boy is about to be sentenced for killing his parents. He begs the judge to spare his life. The judge asks for one good reason he should be shown any mercy. The boy replies, "I’m an orphan, your honor."
One day Little Johnny's class is having an English lesson. The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word intelligent in a sentence?" Little Mary says, "The teacher is very intelligent." The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word fashionable in a sentence?" Little Suzie says, "They are very fashionable." The teacher says, "Johnny, why don't you have a go? Use the word dictate in a sentence." Johnny thinks for a moment and then says, "Last night I heard Daddy asking Mommy 'Darling how does my dictate' "
Teacher: Johnny can you use a sentence with definitely in it Little Johnny: Do farts have lumps in them Teacher: of cause not Johnny Little Johnny: then I’ve definitely shat myself
The next sentence is telling the truth. The previous sentence is telling a lie.
My doctor said I only have 1 year to live, so I killed him. Got sentenced to life in prison, problem solved!
Is Google a girl or a boy?
Obviously a Girl, because it won't let you finish a sentence without making a suggestion.
The doctor gave me one year to live, so I shot him with my gun. The judge gave me 15 years. Problem solved.
Sister: I dont want to do it butt...... Me: no more butts, butts are to yuck to be in this sentence
Whats a prisoners favorite game?
Hangman!
Me going to jail for telling the orphan he has 363 days because mothers and Father’s Day
*Say I'm a man after every sentence* You walk into a bar. (I'm a man) You find a girl . ( I'm a man) You take her home.(I'm a man) She whispers in your ear.(I'm a man)
I have cancer the doctor said I have 3 days to live but I was like fuck it and killed him the jury said I have life in prison I shouted yes he said thank you you saved my life
You couldn't spit out a good sentence even if you ate a bowl of alphabet soup.
I was working at the bank today when an old lady came up to me and asked me to check her balance.
So I pushed her over.
DARK ALERT******** a girl went 2 the doctor the doctor said she had 1yr to live she shot the doctor and the judge gave her 15 yrs. DARK ALERT********
