Knock knock! Who's there? Deja. Deja who? Knock knock!
You know the drill, but do you know the hammer? Hah, nailed that one.
But I also think I screwed it up.
What should you never say to a Japanese person? "You're da bomb!"
What's the difference between a dirty bus station and a lobster with breast implants?
One is a crusty bus station, and the other is a busty crustacean.
What does a transgender call his/her parent?
Transparent.
What do the Spanish people call child abuse? Pedrophile.
I went to see my grandfather in the hospital because I wanted to get to know him better before he passed, maybe take a selfie with him. But when I got there my phone died, so I unplugged a vacuum to plug in my phone. And it turns out he only knows Spanish, so when he kept saying, "Me desconectaste el soporte de mi vida," I thought he wanted water. But when I got back with the water he was asleep, and now my phone was charged, so I translated what he said. And it was, "You unplugged my life support." That's when I called the doctor...
Good news is, I got one sick selfie!
A Mexican magician said he would disappear on the count of three. He said, "Uno, dos," and disappeared without a tres!
What do you call a letter using the bathroom?
The P.
What’s the difference between a hoe and a rooster?
A rooster says, "Cock-a-doodle-doo," and a hoe says, "Any cock will do."
What is the difference between a book and a Mexican?
One has papers.
What did the Chinese girl say when she had a white baby?
"Sum Ting Wong."
Why can't two Asians make a white kid?
Two wrongs don't make a white.
These are all really nice jokes, but here is one.
Boy: Spell ME.
Girl: M-E.
Boy: You forgot the D.
Girl: There is no D in ME.
Boy: Not yet.
Q: What's a German's favorite Undertale character?
A: Gaster.
"I'm sorry" and "I apologize" mean the same thing. Except at a funeral.
What does a perverted frog say?
"Rubbit."
"You da bomb!" "No, you da bomb!"
In the US, a compliment. In the Middle East, an argument.
Why can't dinosaurs talk?
Because they are all dead.
What did the dentist say when he looks into a patient's mouth?
"I C D K"
You know what I see?
DICK
