Humor

I have a cow over at my house spending the night with me because she has been out in the streets homeless and poor, so my family forced it to come and live with me at my place.

The cow asks me, "Where do I keep all the dairy items like the milk, cheese, yogurt, and meat?" I tell her, "In the refrigerator! Where do you think I keep them, on the farm with all the rest of those cows?"

That night we had to share a room and sleep in the same damn bed. Then she started getting high and drank some cow wine with titty milk, and it made her shit all over the bed.

One time there was a squirrel who died.

It was funny because the squirrel got dead.

Guy: Are you depression? 'Cause you're crippling me.

Car driver: No, I'm the guy that hit you with his car and crippled you.

Guy: Don't worry, I was already crippled because I got crippling depression.

Dad: Hey, have you seen that new movie, "Constipation"?

Son: No.

Dad: It hasn't come out yet.

This is a Rickroll. The joke is that you thought you were going to get something else, but instead you got Rickrolled.

Everyone is a gangster until Helen Keller hits a 3 on you.

This is bullshit! Stop showing cheesy and dumb jokes! This website is for dark humor, insults, and morbid content! All of you who don’t talk about the following, go die!

So I went to a church and I asked a friend, "Is the picture on the wall Jesus, and does it have three nails or one nail?" Oh wait, that's not Jesus, he is not doing the T pose that he invited.

Q: Wanna see something funny?

A: Sure.

*bomb Florida*

Why do farts smell?

So deaf people can enjoy them as well.

#NoMoreOrphanJokes

Why isn't Stephen Hawking going to heaven?

Because he's British.

What's the difference between dark humor and normal humor?

Normal humor is ten babies and one trash can.

Dark humor is one baby and ten trash cans.

Scroll down for explanation.

Ten babies in one trash can; one baby in ten means that the baby was chopped up.

Hahahaahhahahahah my joje.

Son: Daddy, what's dark humor?

Dad: See that man over there with no arms or legs? Go tell him to stand up and clap.

Son: But Daddy, I'm blind.

Dad: Exactly.

You want to hear a cheesy pizza joke? Never mind, it's too cheesy!

Hehehehehe.

A joke, huh?

My sense of humor.

Your face.

My grandpa died to ligma :(

LIGMA BALLS!

Orphan jokes are just hurtful, and that is all they are, so please stop.