Misfortune jokes
You're an orphan.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
An apple actually gets picked.
Sorry to hear you feel like poo!
Two tourists climb a mountain that utters certain doom.
One tourist falls down. The tourist that's still on the mountain says, "You ok down there?"
The other tourist says, "Can't I just rest in peace?!"
What does a blind kid and an orphan have in common?
They can’t see their parents.
You look like a double dipped chocolate chip cliff flipped glazed charcoal slim jim Mr. clog hunch frap, no feet, 9 arms, 17 stomachs. You stepdad beat you with a wiffle ball bat. NBA Youngboy was in your bathroom spitting on you and now you got herpes on your left side cheek.
What did the kid say to the orphan?
"Well, at least I have parents!"
UGHHHHHHH TODAY WAS TERRIBLE! My wife got hit by a bus!!! And I lost my job as a bus driver!
My dad is unlucky.
I once told a blind orphan, "Hey, look at the bright side!"
Today sucked. My friend fell off a cliff, and I went to jail.
What do u call an Asian that was born at the wrong time?
Wrong тайминг.
You're at a buffet, you think you're hungry for two, but misfortune happens when you think of yourself. You get stuck looking at sides in the buffet. A roly poly gal you see in the corner of your eye, eyeballing the main dishes in front at the end. You go in for the pickings, you get intercepted by a far more hungrier matter, but you find yourself getting slammed over the buffet table, and realize you are gasping for air, and she is tenderizing you for dinner.
Why couldn't the teacher let her kids out?
Because she has no arms to open the door.
Why did the blind man fall into the well?
He couldn’t see that well.
You're an orphan and blind. You have cancer. You will die in 3 days. Merry Xmas!
What does the blind, deaf child get for Christmas?
Cancer.
Two lepers playing cards... one threw his hand in; the other laughed his head off.
What's the difference between a joke and a tragedy? Timing.
I would roast BlessedBrian, but it seems LIFE already did a thorough job.