Humor
What was the incontinent farmer's greatest problem? He managed his carrot patch but couldn't control his peas!
Sugar Honey Ice Tea.
I FORGOT MY JOKE!
How did Stephen Hawking die?
They unplugged the Wi-Fi cord.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your grandma died, your dad left you too, Now you're living with your old grandma coot. Oh, let's not forget your mom left you, too. You gon' live alone, die alone, with no roses on your casket, too.
Rape jokes like cancer jokes or AIDS jokes are just humorous wordplay. If you don't agree, send me your details, and we'll see if you prefer actual rape to a harmless rape joke... YOU SAD SACKS OF HUMORLESS SHIT MUNCHERS!
What does the pedophile use for bait? Trix!
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He had a computer virus!
What do you call two Mexicans having sex? 50 Shades of Brown.
My phone was at 10%, and my friend said it better not shut down like Stephen Hawking.
What does Jonathan Davis eat for breakfast?
Korn Flakes.
A married woman gets hit by a truck, and the cops tell her husband:
Cop: "Sir, it looks like your wife's been hit by a truck."
Man: "I know, but she has a great personality."
Someone came to me and said, "Your dad is gay." I just said, "Wait. You know where my dad is? Please tell me!"
The Stiggs life is a joke. Wait, I forgot, he doesn't have a life.
Enough of the sex jokes! I mean, come on, they are not even funny!
What planets do Astronauts like to pee on?
Uranus!
(Say this out loud and it will make more sense.)
One time, a cow saved my life.
It was bovine intervention.
What is the similarity between an anti-joke and a clown? Neither are funny.
Why don't we wrestle bears?
The pain is un-bearable.
Man, abortion jokes just don't get old, do they?
In fact, they don't age at all.
Isn't eating a clock time-consuming?