Puns

video games

My boyfriend just broke up with me for talking about video games too much. what a stupid thing to Fallout 4.

Puns

SRP

What’s Thanos’ favorite game? Half-life

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Son

WOW

A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, “This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you.”

The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, “Which do you want, son?” The boy takes the quarters and leaves.

“What did I tell you?” said the barber. “That kid never learns!”

Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream parlor.

“Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?”

The boy licked his cone and replied:

“Because the day I take the dollar the game is over!”

Video Game

Anonymous

What’s a Mexican’s favorite video game?

Borderlands.

0

Win

Anonymous

Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect 4 in only three moves.

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Orphan

Anonymous

why can’t orphans play online games. Because they don’t have parents to sign them up

4

Girlfriend

Tanner Pomeranz

A guy took his blonde girlfriend to the Super Bowl game.

They had great seats right behind their teams bench.

After the game the guy asked his girlfriend how she liked the experience.

“Oh, I really liked it!” she replied, “Especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I couldn’t understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents.”

Dumbfounded, her boyfriend asked, “What do you mean?”

She said, “Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, ‘Get the quarter back! Get the quarter back!’ I’m like, hellooooo! It’s only 25 cents!”

School

Anonymous

when you loose a game of Kahoot so you kashoot up the school

0

Depression

Anonymous

Friend #1: “Yo guys, what’s the most unfair game you’ve ever played? For me it’s Fortnite.”

Friend #2: “I’d have to say Monopoly.”

Me: “The most unfair game you say? Life, definitely. Like, no one wins, it’s a one-way game.”

Friend #2: “Uhh…that’s not exactly what he meant…”

Friend #1: calls the suicide hotline

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Adoption

MyJokesRBetterThanYours

A family of 3, a dad, a mom, and a 12 year old son are driving in the car when the dad says, “How about we play a little game of two truths and a lie. It’ll be fun.” “Ok,” the mom and son reply happily. “Let me start,” says the son. “Ok, go ahead,” replies the mom. “I hate video games, I hate school, and I love junk food,” says the son. “Ooh ooh! You do love junk food, you do hate school, and you don’t hate video games.” Says the mom. “Your right!” He replies. “I’ll go next,” says the dad. I love your mom, you’re adopted, and my dad almost died in WWII.” “Hmm… Your dad did not almost die in WWII, obviously I’m not adopted, and you do love my mom.” Says the son. “The lie isn’t that your adopted.” Says the dad.

5

Orphan

Monty mate

What’s a orphan favourite game?

GTA because there actually wanted?

Lol

Jack

The Special

My life is a lot like a game of Black Jack

I always hit on 16, the get busted

0

Wait

Anonymous

i wonder if stephen hawking has ever watched avengers end game… oh wait he cant

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Stick

Anonymous

I brought my cousin to an arcade and I gave her 5$ to go play a game but she tugged my joy stick to hard

1

Kobe

Gabe Itch

I wanted to play as Kobe in my console but the game crashed.

Woman

Anonymous

A elderly woman and an elderly man were at a retirement home The man was shuffling a deck of cards for a card game The man asks "Is it your first time?" The woman replies “It’s been a while since a man has asked me that.”

Emo

Korvus

What game does an emo hate the most?

Cut the Rope

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Quarter

Anonymous

Why do women like PacMan so much? How else can you get eaten 3 tomes for a quarter?

Orphan

Anonymous

why cant the orphan play the game of life? they dont know what a family road trip is. 😆

Baseball

Daniel King

Why did the police 👮 go to a baseball ⚾️ game?

Because a player stole the base.