Game Jokes

What's Thanos' favorite game?

Half-life.

What's a Mexican's favorite video game?

Borderlands.

Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect 4 in only three moves.

My boyfriend just broke up with me for talking about video games too much. What a stupid thing to Fallout 4.

A young boy enters a barber shop, and the barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you."

The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?" The boy takes the quarters and leaves.

"What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!"

Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream parlor.

"Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?"

The boy licked his cone and replied:

"Because the day I take the dollar the game is over!"

A guy took his blonde girlfriend to the Super Bowl game.

They had great seats right behind their team's bench.

After the game, the guy asked his girlfriend how she liked the experience.

"Oh, I really liked it!" she replied, "Especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I couldn’t understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents."

Dumbfounded, her boyfriend asked, "What do you mean?"

She said, "Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, 'Get the quarter back! Get the quarter back!' I’m like, hellooooo! It’s only 25 cents!"

What's an orphan's favorite game?

GTA, because they're actually wanted? Lol.

When her head game is so strong, she sucks the chromosome right out of you.

Why can't the orphan play the game of life? They don't know what a family road trip is. 😆

Why can't orphans play online games? Because they don't have parents to sign them up.

When you lose a game of Kahoot, so you kashoot up the school.

My life is a lot like a game of Black Jack.

I always hit on 16, then get busted.

I brought my cousin to an arcade and I gave her $5 to go play a game, but she tugged my joystick too hard.

It’s all fun and games at “take your kid to work day” until you realize your dad is a suicide bomber.

The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.

A guy meets a sex worker in a bar. She says, “This is your lucky night. I’ve got a special game for you. I’ll do absolutely anything you want for £300 as long as you can say it in three words.” The guy replies, “Hey, why not?” He pulls his wallet out of his pocket and lays £300 on the bar, and says slowly, “Paint...my....house.”

What’s New York’s favorite game?

2001 flight simulator.

Friend #1: "Yo guys, what's the most unfair game you've ever played? For me it's Fortnite."

Friend #2: "I'd have to say Monopoly."

Me: "The most unfair game you say? Life, definitely. Like, no one wins, it's a one-way game."

Friend #2: "Uhh...that's not exactly what he meant..."

Friend #1: *calls the suicide hotline*

I wanted to play as Kobe in my console, but the game crashed.

An elderly woman and an elderly man were at a retirement home.

The man was shuffling a deck of cards for a card game.

The man asks, "Is it your first time?"

The woman replies, "It's been a while since a man has asked me that."