Humor
A daughter asked her mother how to spell penis. Her mom said, "You should have asked me last night. It was at the tip of my tongue."
Knock knock.
Who's there?
No one.
No one who?
No one who?
What did the female farmer say to the person who raises a male chicken? "Nice cock!"
I like my wine like my women:
16 and in my basement.
My phone is just like the Twin Towers; they got put in airplane mode.
I was at work and a few fat women came up to me and asked for some help.
Later that week, I ran into them on the dance floor. One of them asked me if I wanted to dance. I told her no. The other asked me if I knew what was cracking. I calmly said, "The floor."
"A priest, an imam, and a rabbit walk into a clinic to donate blood. The rabbit turns to the nurse and says, 'I think I'm a Type-O!'"
I told my dad that I wanted to go to a college with a 100% acceptance rate and a 50% graduation rate, and he said, "Your mom doesn't count as a college!"
This is not a joke, but if your uncle tells you, "Bend over, touch your toes, I'll show you where the monster goes," don't do it, hehehehehe.
Why did Little Johnny drop his ice cream?
Because he got hit by a bus.
I'd tell a bad baby joke, but I decided to abort.
My jokes are so dark that I am surprised that the cops didn't shoot them yet.
What do you call a Black man having a seizure?
Chocolate shake.
What do you call it when a gorilla bumps uglies with an orangutan?
Monkeypox.
What do two priests say to each other when they walk into an orphanage?
"Let us pray."
What do you call it when someone fucks shoe inserts?
Orthopediphilia.
What do you call a prostitute in a wheelchair?
Hot wheels.
What do you call a disabled kid's sweat?
VEGETABLE OIL!
Dad: Why did Jimmy fall off his bicycle?
Son: Why?
Dad: Because somebody threw a washing machine at him.
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