Jokes About Pedophiles

Evan

Say what you want about Pedophiles but at least they drive slow through school zones

The Best Boi

My girlfriend is 19 and I’m 29. We go out to eat in a restaurant but the whole time I have to deal with being accused of being a pedo, being called disgusting and disturbed.

It completely ruined our 10 year anniversary

Anonymous

My girlfriend keeps calling me a pedophile. That’s a big word for a seven year old.

8
Anonymous

The judge asked me "How does 5 to 10 years sound?" I said “Sexy.”

1
Anonymous

What’s the hardest part about being a pedophile?

Fitting in.

I take bleach shot glass

What do a pedophile and a clock have in common…neither of them go pass 12.

5
Anonymous

What does a turtle and a pedophile have in common? – They both want to get there before the hare does.

6
Anonymous

A pedophile and a little boy are walking into the woods late at night.

The little boy says, “I’m scared.”

The pedophile says, “You think you’re scared? I have to walk back alone!”

7
JB

Statistics show that 1 in 3 people live next to a padophile however I think that’s a lie because I just live next to 2 stunning 8 year olds

2
CheetoBandito

What do you call a a fight between an illegal immigrant and a pedophile? Alien vs Predator.

4
Anonymous
in Minor

What’s a Pedophiles Favorite type of garden

A kindergarden

3
Anonymous
in Puns

People who are afraid of pedophiles… need to grow up.

6
Person

Ten Catholic priests all die in a bus accident. When they arrive at the pearly gates, St. Peter acknowledges them. He sees that they’re all priests and immediately says "If any of you are pedophiles, there’s no point waiting here. You might as well eff off straight to hell right now!” Nine of the priests turn around and begin to walk away. St. Peter calls after them, "AND TAKE THE DEAF BASTARD WITH YOU TOO!”

5
Phydeaux

Ever wonder where people got their surnames? Mr Baker was probably a baker. Mr Butcher was probably a butcher. And then there was Mr Dickinson…

5
Smokescreen

How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb? Must be more than 13, because my basement is still dark

Don

What’s a pedophile’s favorite part of a hockey game? Before the first period starts.

3
This is life now.

What do you call an all you can eat buffet for a Pedophile? A school bus.

9
Math

Girls are like math if there under ten then you use your fingers

Anonymous
in Puns

What did the pedophile say when he got out of prison?

I feel like a kid again.

0
Person Man

My friend told me he had a sister. i asked if she was hot and he said she was 8. that wasnt my question