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Puns

Colebot

Have you ever tried eating a clock? It’s really time-consuming, especially if you go for seconds.

Jesus

Canadian

A man goes into heaven and there he meets jesus. He asks Jesus what that broken clock is there for. Jesus says “that is mother teresa’s clock it has never moved because she has never lied”. “There is Abraham Lincolns clock. He has .lied twice so it has moved twice.” “Where is Donald Trump’s?” Ask’s the man. Jesus answers “it is in my office, I am using it as a ceiling fan.”

Puns

Anonymous

6:30 is the best time on a clock… hands down.

Puns

Mango

What happens when a clock is hungry It goes back four seconds.

Common

I take bleach shot glass

What do a pedophile and a clock have in common…neither of them go pass 12.

Puns

Anonymous

I’ve just been fired from the clock making factory after all those extra hours I put in.

Girl

Anonymous

why did the girls sit on the clock. To be on time

Puns

Anonymous

They Are making a movie about clocks.

It’s about time.

Jesus

Anonymous

A man goes into heaven and there he meets jesus. He asks Jesus what that broken clock is there for. Jesus says “that is mother teresa’s clock it has never moved because she has never lied”. “There is Abraham Lincolns clock. He has .lied twice so it has moved twice.” “Where is Donald Trump’s?” Ask’s the man. Jesus answers “it is in my office, I am using it as a ceiling fan.”

148

Hand

Anonymous

What did the robber say to the clock?

Hands up!

Sally

Beastifiar

Why did sally fall of the swing-someone chucked a brick at her. Why did sally through a clock out the window-she had brain damage from the brick.

Cleverness

Anonymous

What do you call a clever clock? Clockwise

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Shooting

Corbin

How do you kill time

Easy taking alarm clock and an assault rifle

Time

Aka Jokes

You: Finds a time clock that can change time

Your friend the next day: Hey, can borrow yo’ house

You: No I’m trying to figure out what to do with my TIME

Also you: Changes the time back to 1267 so you don’t have to have that friend again

Puns

Anonymous

If you eat a clock then does that mean you’ve consumed time?

German

Gh0st

When a clock goes forward, it’s tic-tac, but when Rommel goes backwards, its tactic!

Puns

Ash

They finally made a movie about a clock, about time

Man

Ron

what did the man say when he swallowed a clock and tried to go to the bathroom? WATCH OUT!!!

Time

Anonymous

I once made a belt out of clocks. It was a waist of time.

Man

Anonymous

A man walked into a shop and asked the shop keeper for a potato-clock. The shop keeper said, 'I dont know what a potato clock is’ The man said, 'me neither but im starting a new job and my boss told me work starts at 9 so id have to get a potato clock

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