What’s a similarity between your best friend and a tree? They both fall over when you hit them with an axe.

How are school shooting victims and school shooting jokes similar?

They never get old.

What is the similarity between a joke and food?

Some people just don’t get them!

Whats similar between a priest and McDonalds?

They both shove their meat inbetween 10 year old buns

What’s the similarity between a broken pencil and my life? They’re both pointless.

What’s a similarity Cliff Hanger and Nooses?

They both leave you Hanging

What is a similarity between a pregnant 14-year-old and the fetus inside of her?

They both are thinking “Shit! Mom is gonna kill me!”

What’s the similarity between a bag of chips and a gun?

When you pull one out in class, everybody wants to be your friend.

As a scientist, I confirm that you speak too fast, it has a speed of 1 bullshit per second.

What do babies and grenades have in common? They both make noise when you throw them.

What’s the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb

You can’t unscrew a pregnant woman

What’s a similarity between a broken lightbulb, and a pregnant woman

They’re both accidents

whats the similarities between an emo and some Christmas lights

they are both going to be hanging from a tree

Why is a sick person and California similar? They tend to burn up.

What’s the similarity between a Christmas ornament and a person?

They both hang…

What is the similarities of an orphan and a newborn plant, Both their parents were seperated.

why r vaginas and the Mariana trench similar lots of seamen goes missing there

Dark humor and woman are very similar…

Not everyone appreciates them, but they both give everyone something to make fun of.

What’s the similarity between Catholic Priests and Mcdonalds ? They both like sticking there meat in 6 year old buns.

What’s the similarity between peas from Tesco and emos? They both have barcodes

What’s similar between the twin towers and Kbe Bryant They both can crashing down