Similarity

Similarity Jokes

Fetus

What is a similarity between a pregnant 14-year-old and the fetus inside of her?

They both are thinking, "Shit! Mom is gonna kill me!"

Friend

What's a similarity between your best friend and a tree?

They both fall over when you hit them with an axe.

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  • Food

    What is the similarity between a joke and food?

    Some people just don't get them!

    Woman

    What's the similarity between women and car parking spaces? The good ones are always taken, and sometimes when nobody's looking, you slip in the disabled one.

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  • Memes

    Baby

    What do babies and grenades have in common? They both make noise when you throw them.

    Orphan

    What is the similarity between orphans and apples?

    They both get thrown out.

    Bullshit

    As a scientist, I confirm that you speak too fast. It has a speed of 1 bullshit per second.

    Pillow

    What’s the similarities between a pillow and your mom?

    They’re both in my bed.

    Woman

    Dark humor and women are very similar...

    Not everyone appreciates them, but they both give everyone something to make fun of.

    Dick

    What’s the similarity between my dick and my girlfriend?

    I beat both of them.

    Penis

    Do you know what the similarity between a penis and cucumber is?

    They both have cum in it.

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  • Bag of chips

    What’s the similarity between a bag of chips and a gun?

    When you pull one out in class, everybody wants to be your friend.

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  • Teacher

    I was in cooking class and my teacher said, "Does anyone know what a chopping board is similar to?"

    Me and my friend just glanced at each other and burst out laughing.

    Long story short, the teacher understood the joke, and now we are both in daily therapy. 😭💀

    Life

    What's the similarity between a broken pencil and my life?

    They're both pointless.

    Priest

    What does a priest and a wristwatch have in common? They both start at 12.

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  • Vagina

    Why are vaginas and the Mariana Trench similar? Lots of seamen go missing there.

    Pea

    What’s the similarity between peas from Tesco and emos?

    They both have barcodes.