Humor
My girlfriend broke up with me, so I took her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?
Your mom said, "Can you get to the dick game?"
I went to a feminist picnic the other day.
It was great, apart from the fact no one made any sandwiches.
Yo mama is so fat that when she fell, I didn't laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.
What do you call a woodpecker without a beak?
A headbanger.
yes
What's the difference between a rubber and Michael Jackson? Nothing, kids touch them both.
A pair of cows were talking in the field. One says, "Have you heard about the mad cow disease that's going around?"
"Yeah," the other cow says. "Makes me glad I'm a penguin."
Why make a joke when I wake up and look at myself?
What is smegma name?
What do you call depressed coffee?
Despresso ;)
Yo mama so ugly, when she went to unlock her phone with her face, it said, "disconnected."
What do you call 2 lesbians in a canoe?
Fur Traders.
Why can't orphans go to the hospital? Because it is a family hospital. Sorry for the long break in between my jokes. I just had some family stuff, but I am back.
A little girl was sitting with some other kids. She thought to herself, "I want to have kids when I'm older, at least they’ll have a home, parents, and hopefully a dad that actually came back with the milk!" 🤣😂
What kind of bath bomb does an emo person use?
A toaster.
I told a joke to a guy who had jumped off a bridge... He was in bits! 🤣🤦♂️
How was the slice of cheese 🧀 doing in the kitchen?
Cheddar!
TEST QUESTION: what looks like half an apple?
My cousin: the other half.
What do you call a person with no arms?
Armless.
No, it's harmless.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite tv show?
Family Guy.