A little girl was sitting with some other kids. She thought to herself, "I want to have kids when I'm older, at least they’ll have a home, parents, and hopefully a dad that actually came back with the milk!" 🤣😂
Humor
What kind of bath bomb does an emo person use?
A toaster.
I told a joke to a guy who had jumped off a bridge... He was in bits! 🤣🤦♂️
How was the slice of cheese 🧀 doing in the kitchen?
Cheddar!
TEST QUESTION: what looks like half an apple?
My cousin: the other half.
What do you call a person with no arms?
Armless.
No, it's harmless.
What is the only place fat people live?
Obi-city.
Treat me like a joke, and I will leave you like it's funny.
Your hairline is so far back it was friends with the dinosaurs!
Somebody told me to cheer up so.... I told him to pass me a rope :)
What’s the only advantage of being an orphan?
Nobody makes jokes about yo mamma.
My girlfriend broke up with me, so I took her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?
I went to a feminist picnic the other day.
It was great, apart from the fact no one made any sandwiches.
What do you call a person who doesn't masturbate?
A liar.
All these jokes really hijacking my mind.
I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet.
Then I was even sadder, because that lucky guy didn't even *need* shoes!
Which book takes an extreme turn and has an incredible plot twist?
- The math book. Suddenly letters appear in the calculations...
My gay ass: I want to find Jesus.
Religious mom: FINALLY!
Me: Grabs a noose.
What did the Chinese girl say when she had a baby?
"Sum ting wong."
The trip from your eyebrow to your hairline costs $6000.
