Humor
These two cannibals are sitting by the campfire having dinner. One says, "I can't stand my mother-in-law." The other says, "So, just eat the potatoes."
We don't read backwards.
Sans: Zzzzzzzz
Papyus: SANS WAKE UP!!
Sans: What is it dude?
Papyus: A human has fallen from the surface world!
Sans: And you gotta BONE to pick with 'em??
Papyus: Grrrrr....
Sans: Oh come on that was a real RIBTICKLER.
What's red, 6 inches long, and makes my girlfriend cry when I feed it to her?
Her miscarriage.
Why did the octopus cross the road?
To get to the other TIDE!!! 🤣🐙🐙
Memes
SO @JusTlivInG wanted me to do some Yo Mamma Jokes
Once there was this Whichdoctor. He walked barefoot most of the time, which gave him impressive calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, and the food gave him bad breath, which made him (wait for it) a Super Callused Fragile Mystic Hexed By Halitosis.
What happens at night in Bangladesh?
It gets Dhaka.
Why did Steven Hawking have no friends?
He couldn’t stand anyone...
Why the f was my shooting joke removed? It was funny, and this is obviously a website for morbid humor. WTF, I mean, worstjokesever.com. Come on...
What do you call a blonde in a freezer?
Her parents called her Cindy, so we should probably continue calling her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.
What do you call a sad coffee?
Despesso.
Before the chicken or the egg, there was only Chuck Norris.
What's the difference between baby Jesus and the baby I keep in my basement?
Baby Jesus died a virgin.
What is the definition of African-American Vienna sausages?
cocks of African-American men
My friend made this joke (so I’m going steal it). I’m surrounded by fat people, oh wait... it’s just one.
My doctor is a very attractive woman; gorgeous face, nice boobs, smoking hot body. She said to me, “You are in your 50’s now, you have GOT to stop masturbating.” I asked why. She replied, “Because I’m trying to examine you, ya’ pervert!!!”
What does a dyslexic zombie eat? Brian's, hahahahaha!
How much pussy does a priest get? None.
What is the difference between a wagon filled with sand and a wagon filled with newborns?
You cannot unload the sand with a pitchfork.
Why are orphans so skinny?
They never eat anything that is family size.