What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Well, at least one gets picked.
Q: What does LMAO mean?
A: Launching Missiles At Orphanages.
Did you know the letter "F" in orphan stands for family?
April Fool's joke: Go to an orphanage and tell them, "Their parents came back."
When someone calls you, say this: "Hi, welcome to Dave’s Orphanage. You make them, we take them. How may I help you?"
Once I saw a girl crying and asked, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working at orphanages.
Dad: "I'm giving all your toys to the orphanage."
Kid: "Why are you doing that?"
Dad: "So you won't get bored there."
When you go to an orphanage for a field trip: When the workers said, "I remember you as a kid."
A cemetery should be built next to orphanages, so the orphans can see their parents.
Last night I burned down an orphanage.
There was one survivor who said I would regret it. I said, "What are you gonna do, tell your parents?"
Well, I'm off to the orphanage to tell "yo mama" jokes.
If someone calls you, reply with this: “Hi, this is Dave’s orphanage and pizzeria, where yesterday’s loss is today’s sauce! How may I assist you today?”
Do you want to know why they call it an orphanage? Because they couldn't call it orphans home.
Why can't orphans have a five-star GTA because they're not wanted?
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be wanted.
Why are orphans bad at poker? They don’t know what a full house is.
I saw a child crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were. Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage.
What do you call an orphan’s family reunion? Me time.
Did you know? The letter ‘f’ in orphan stands for family.
What is an orphan’s least favorite song? We Are Family.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? Family Guy.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite movie? Meet the Parents.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite type of music? House.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.
What’s an orphan’s favorite band? Foster the People.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
Where do orphan chickens end up? Foster Farms.
What beer do orphans drink? Foster’s.
Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What do you call a fish with no parents? An orfin.
Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because it’s the only love they get.
Me: Are you an orphan? Orphan: Yes, what gave me away? Me: Your parents.
A girl and a dog were dropped off at an orphanage. Why was she crying before she went in? Because the people came back for their dog.
What's missing in an orphanage computer?
"The motherboard."
What's a depressed person's favorite drink?
Depresso expresso.
JK, bleach.
Hi, welcome to Dave's Orphanage. You make them, we take them. How may I help you?
How many orphans does it take to "test drive" a bus? It depends on how much space the orphanage has and how much space the cemetery has.
