Freezer

Freezer Jokes

Blonde

What do you call a blonde in the freezer?

Her parents named her Cindy, so we should probably continue to call her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.

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  • Body

    A woman went out on a date and said, “I’m thirty-one with the body of a sixteen-year-old.” The man responded, “Wanna show me? 😏” The woman took him back to her house and opened her freezer and said, “Take a look.”

    Body

    It’s really hard to maintain a good body lately, unless you put it in a freezer.

    Santa Claus

    What is worse to have - a dead baby or a dead Santa Claus?

    Santa. You need extra freezers for reindeer.

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  • Chicken

    When you hear your mom’s car pull in the driveway and you remember that she told you to take the chicken out of the freezer 7 hours ago.

    Hunter

    One day, someone goes out into the forest to go hunting, and finds out there are a few others in the forest. He comes back the next day to learn he is the only person there.

    Where are the others?

    They're in his freezer.

    Difference

    What's the difference between a gay man and a freezer?

    A freezer doesn't scream when you put meat inside it.

    Gay

    What's the difference between a gay and a freezer?

    The freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.

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  • Parrot

    One day, inexplicably, my talking parrot started insulting me. He called me an idiot, a fool, a jerk, stupid, and a variety of other nasty names. I warned the squawker to cease, but to no avian avail. Fed up, I finally flipped the foul-mouthed feather-brain into the freezer...but after about 15 seconds, I relented and let him out.

    "I'm so sorry," he declared! "I don't know what came over me, and realize I shouldn't have said those terrible things. I hope you can forgive me, and I promise never to do it again! By the way...what did the chicken do?" 🐔😂

    Jeffrey Dahmer

    What did Jeffrey Dahmer say to the men he took home that said they were hungry? "I've got Ben and Jerry's in the freezer."

    Melania Trump

    Question; Why do they call Melania Trump the "Walk-In" Freezer?

    Answer; It's because that is where EVERYONE goes to "Hang Their Meat"!

    Body

    Do you know how hard it is to maintain a good body these days?

    I think Jeffrey Dahmer had the right idea, just put it in the freezer.

    Cannibal

    "Hey, man, do you have any Ben and Jerry's?"

    "Yeah, I have two of them, fresh and preserved in the freezer."

    "I meant the ice cream, bro..."

    Kid

    One late night, my wife caught me standing in front of the freezer.

    She asked me, "What are you doing?"

    I replied, "I'm making a pink yeti."

    She asked, "What does that mean?"

    I said, "I left our kid in the freezer for a couple hours."

    Difference

    What's the difference between a gay guy and a freezer? The freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.

    What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? They both used their brains to paint the walls.

    Ice Cream

    Why did Jeffrey eat all the ice cream in one sitting?

    To make room in the freezer for his special meat.