Humor

What do you call an Asian Chihuahua?

A Konichiuahua.

Q: Why couldn’t Poe Dameron find his sandwich?

A: Because BB-8 it.

Ya it's bad:)

Why was the T-rex so angry? You would be angry too if your arms were too short to masturbate.

What do you call a spice with a PHD?

Dr. Pepper

What do you call a person who's got their wisdom tooth removed too late?

Dumb.

A poster for the winter relief fund reads: "No one should be allowed to go hungry or suffer from the cold." A worker says to his friend, "Now were not even allowed to do that."

Visiting Alabama? Pop-up dating ads be like: "Never be lonely at cousinsonly.com."

Friend: "UR LIT BRO!!"

Me: "That's what my sleeve said to my arm."

When someone says you're adopted, say, "But you're still at the orphanage."

Q. What's an orphan's favorite South Park episode?

A. The anti-Family Guy episode.

Help, my ADHD is so bad that not even I can focus in a concentration camp.

What does Michael Jackson have in common with Kmart?

They're both dead...

Ruin a quote by attributing it to the wrong person.

"Don't cry because it is over. Smile because it happened." -Adolf Hitler, 1945.

What do Colorado and Saudi Arabia have in common?

It's legal to get stoned.

Mother, “Johnny, if you keep being this naughty, you’ll get kids who will be very naughty to you!”

Johnny, “Oh mom, you just betrayed yourself there, didn’t you?”

I'm telling my kids that in 2020 I survived world war 3, the zombie apocalypse, the invasion of the murder hornets, and the second American revolution.

I ran into a dwarf and he said: "Well, I’m not Happy."

Then which one are you?

I'd make a joke about an obese person, but it won't work out.

Two skeleton brothers are talking.

1st bro: "Hey, get up! You and do some exercise! You are so heavy, you weigh a ton!"

2nd bro: "A skele-TON :)"

What's an African's favorite sport to play, but they can't? Water polo.