Health jokes
Why does Africa have no pharmacies? Because you can't have medicine on an empty stomach.
Heyyy, in the last six months, [I had] 4 suicide attempts, broke up with 3 girls, and my mom went on drugs.
Why did the serial killer let the guy in a wheelchair go? Because the guy didn’t really have any body for the serial killer to stab.
So I gave a disabled kid hot wheels. I mean cars, no I gave him literal hot wheels!
I knew a girl that died from having phone sex... He died of hearing aids.
Technoblade: It is high vitamin B.
Quackiity: What does vitamin B stand for?
Technoblade: Broke.
A: Do you eat food?
B: Yes...
A: You can sit on deez nuts then!
B: Omg I have depression now.
What is a part of a vegetable you can't eat?
The wheelchair.
You're so skinny you use floss to wipe your butt.
You're so fat you can't see your penis when you piss.
Bestie Hannah heard that bestie Iz had a migraine! What did she do? She said, "My grains don’t hurt that much, at least not when the animals eat them!"
What happens when someone shoots the Hulk?
He got gangryeen.
Gangrene+green+angry
So I was in the lunch room and was sitting by the peanut allergic kids' table. I stood up and I threw an opened bag of peanuts at them and yelled, "25 kill streak!" 🤣😂
Zachary Disease Joke 🤣🤣🤣
https://youtu.be/xtmB7mZDYAs
Hello, welcome to Joe’s Pizzeria and Abortion Clinic, where yesterday’s loss is today’s sauce! How may I help you today?
Stroke victims are my heroes.
My favorite is Louis C.K.
Doctor: Tomorrow is like John Cena, you won’t see it.
Why did the Mexican take the tamale to the hospital?
Tamlito.
When your girlfriend has been vomiting for 2 weeks and you find out she’s not pregnant.
Bf-*yes I knew it was a prank*
She has cancer.
How bad is explosive diarrhea when a Muslim has it? Because my Chipotle blew up yesterday.