Health jokes
When that one night stand says she has AIDS but you laugh, "I choose D!"
She says...wait what?? I have all of the above! XD
What do you call an appetite including apples? Appletite.
A man lost his left arm.
He's all right now.
Guy goes to the doctor. The doctor says, "You look run down." The guy says, "No, I've come on my bike!"
Why do people eat bananas? Because it's appealing!
Why did the vampire go to the doctor?
Because of his coffin.
For a while, lead was used in pencils, but... we realised that it might not have been the smartest idea because it lead (badoom ching) to some people getting lead poisoning.
I know a little girl who once had an accident. When I asked her what her favorite song was, she responded with "🎶Head, shoulders, wheels, and frame! Wheels and frame!🎶"
Who's climbing the tree?..... Not Sarah.
Who is in hospital?.... Sarah.
An apple walked into the clinic.
The doctor asked what his favorite color was.
The apple said "red." :)
One random YouTube comment in 2018: "Soon, a virus will come to Earth."
A year later: "Pahahahahah that comment is fake lmaoooo ahahahha!"
Another year later: "Time to die a painful death."
Another year later: "God has come with the cure!"
You're fat. Don't sugar coat it because you would probably eat that, too.
It's snot fair!
Tired kid with asthma: "It's hard to breathe."
Gym Teacher: "That's alright."
Other Kid: "Hush!"
Doctor, Doctor, I discovered one of the base pairs in my genetic code is erroneously a stop codon?
Nonsense! That shouldn't be happening!
Did you hear about the nurse who couldn’t swim?
She ended up under the doc[tor].
Keep rolling your eyes and maybe you'll find a brain back there.
What did the doctor say to the potato?
It told it it had tuberculosis.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Covid.
Covid who?
The thing that killed half a billion people!
We recently found out my grandpa is addicted to Viagra.
No one is taking it harder than grandpa.