Glue Jokes

Falcon-is-Communist
in Puns

Guy 1:"Tell me a bad pun" Guy 2: "Alright What’s the difference between a tuna fish, a piano and a tube of glue" Guy 1: "Ok that last one was random as heck what is the difference" Guy 2: " you can tuna a piano, but you can’t piano a tuna" Guy 1: "Ok where does the glue come in" Guy 2: “Ah i knew you’d get stuck on that”

you might be

3
Big Boss Tom

The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn’t talking to me.

9
Xzavier
in Little Johnny

A salesman rings the door bell and Little Johnny answers. Salesman: “Can I see your dad?” Johnny: “No, he’s in the shower.” Salesman: “What about your mother? Can I see her?” Johnny: “Nope. She’s in the shower, too.” Salesman: “Do you think they’ll be out soon?” Johnny: “Doubt it. When my dad asked me for the Vaseline, I gave him super glue instead.”

By:Xzavier

uh no
in Little Johnny

Fred and Mary got married, but can’t afford a honeymoon, so they go back to Fred’s parent’s home for their first night together. In the morning, Johnny, Fred’s little brother, gets up and has his breakfast. As he is going out of the door to go to school, he asks his Mom if Fred and Mary are up yet. She replies, “No”. Johnny asks, “Do you know what I think?” His mom replies, “I don’t want to hear what you think! Just go to school.” Johnny comes home for lunch and asks his mom, “Are Fred and Mary up yet?” She replies, “No.” Johnny says, “Do you know what I think?” His mom replies, “Never mind what you think! Eat your lunch and go back to school.” After school, Johnny comes home and asks again, “Are Fred and Mary up yet?” His mom says “No.” He asks, “Do you know what I think?” His Mom replies, “Ok, do tell me what you think?” He says: “Last night Fred came to my room for the Vaseline and I think I gave him my airplane glue.”

Anonymous
in Roast

My wife told me pass her lip stck but i gave her a glue stick now she is not talking to me

Boomba Bay

I know this isn’t about glue but here’s one: Cardi B had a sister who was obsessed with fitness. Her name? Cardi O.

snapchat is @endermen_1

How do you confuse Helen Keller? You rearrange the furniture and glue doorknobs to the walls.

2
Anonymous

A man ate a glue stick. It tasted bad. He died.hahahahah

Anonymous
in Music

What’s the difference between tuna, a piano and glue? – You can tuna piano, but you can’t piano a tuna.

4
Blanche D. Blank
in Puns

I have good faith in the glue police. They usually stick to their word.

Anonymous

What do you call Nicki Minaj covered in glue? Sticky Minaj

Anonymous

what does a tuna, piano, and a tub of glue have in comen? you can tune a piano but you can’t piano a tuna? but what about the glue said bob I ? new you would get stuck on that

Anonymous
in Puns

What is the difference between tuna a piano and glue? you can tuna piano but you cannot piano a tuna. (the person you ask should say what about the glue) response: I knew you would get stuck there.

Gwen
in Blue

It’s amazing how many things ryme with blue.

Blue, sue, stew, poo, screw, new, boo, do, rue, glue, you, to, too, flew, you, goo, zoo, two, moo, woo, ooh, blew…

Anonymous

A happy mother : " Why is your sister so quiet!?!, AND HOW DID YOU GET SUPER GLUE STUCK ON YOUR PENIS!?!"

1
Wabadabadodap

What’s the diffrence between a piano,a pot of glue and a tuna fish? You can tuna piano but you can’t piano a tuna. What about the glue? I knew youd get stuck there

he

i put a glue in a man :)

MIRIAM.Y

what happens if you put your hand in glue,your hand will stay there forever im joking hahaha

Ello

Hi guys I’m back and YES two jokes/blogs in one day. I KNOW. I just have nothing to do!!! So today I’m going to tell you how to get what you want from your parents!!! And there will be a joke at the end too. Enjoy! So The prank that I have for you guys today is, make sure you have glue, die, and a toothbrush that is not your’s >:) So you are going to put the die in the glue and then put the glue on the toothbrush and give it to your sibling and say “here. I got your toothbrush ready for you” Then, make sure they take it. Once they take it, run so that they can not hit you once they taste it. Thanks for reading this prank today guys!!! I hope it works out for you and I can’t wait to hear what happens with you guys in the comments below so make sure to comment and tell me what happened when you pulled this prank!! Sorry Prankster if this is offensive to you since you do pranks too. I will not do them anymore if you don’t want me to :) Thanks for reading guys and here is that joke I told you about :)

 Yo mama is so fat when she got in the car the wheels popped. 
      So I know this was not the best joke and I can do better, but I will keep trying and see you guys next time! Bye!!! :)