Health jokes
What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable?
Putting her back in the wheelchair when you're done.
Yo mama is so fat that her wheelchair had to be made into a couch!
The doctor said I would make it, but then Spider-Man came in holding a PS5.
What is Chuck Norris' favorite Sonic song?
"Open Your Heart."
Repeat after me: shut up; shut up; I don’t shut up, I grow up, and when I look at you, I throw up. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Memes
One time, I worked at the zoo and I was feeding the monkeys.
And one of them μяɨɲąţ€ď on me.
And I went to the hospital and got a bloody nose the next day.
The doctor had an ego so big, it fell into the ocean fast.
How do the Powerpuff Girls vape?
They take a "power puff."
We recently found out my grandpa is addicted to Viagra.
No one is taking it harder than grandpa.
What is an old lady's favorite exercise?
Trying to get up from the soft couch.
Health and safety tips: Looking at your hairline is hazardous. For your best interest, please look away.
Yo mama so stupid, she tried to wake up sleeping pills.
How do you get rid of a fat ghost? You exercise it.
Your hairline goes so far back you have to wear sunscreen.
My friend asked which is better to have, and you have to choose: autism or Down syndrome?
💪 💪 🏋️♂️ What do you get when you cross a physically disabled gay white male who works out at the gym, who is a bukkake slut, and a physically disabled gay white male who works out at the gym, who is a sex worker?
Cum Junkie.
Why should you never throw grandpa's false teeth at a vehicle? You might denture car.
What do you call a javelin thrower with Parkinson’s?
Shakespeare.
Why did the rapper go to the dentist?
Because he had too many FILL-INS.
Why was the rapper always in good shape?
Because he never skipped a beat!