Health jokes
Who is the blindest person in the world?
Why did the rape victim stop eating pears?
Because she was told that if you rearrange the letters "PEAR," it spells "rape."
Why is my anus burning?
'Cause I sat on an open lighter, oh god, help!
What’s white and sticky and better to spit out than to swallow? Toothpaste.
How do you circumcise a redneck? Kick his sister in the jaw.
Youch
Why does cancer kill you? Because it does. 🌝
Badminton: Your breath is so bad that you have to take a mint before you go on Fortnite.
"I can lose 10 ugly pounds anytime I want -- I'll just cut off my head!"
Do you use humor to make light of your emotional eating and your weight? Make jokes about overeating and being fat as a way of getting along with other people? I was a Grand Champion at it.
It ain't always easy having erectile dysfunction, but it sure as hell ain't hard.
Our soon to be ex-Justice Minister is trying to distract us from his own misconduct charges by funding advocates for crime victims.
He should fund proctologists too because he'll likely need both after prison.
I went to the doctor's yesterday. I said, "When I touch my back, it hurts. When I touch my knee, it hurts. When I touch anything, it hurts!" 😣 What’s wrong with me?
Doctor: You’ve broken your finger.
My friend called me fat, so I challenged him to a running race.
Q: What's an animation similar to Finding Nemo, but the fish has cancer? A: Finding Kemo.
What's the difference between a salad and a baby? People don't usually scream when you shake around a salad.
When Stephen Hawking died, did they take him to the hospital or PC World?
Why did I cross the road to might get hit by a car or a bus?
I got kicked out of the hospital for saying, "Stay Positive," to the corona patients.
Why didn't Biden get the virus?
He sniffed everyone!
Why did the alligator see a crocodile?
Because it ate too many humans, and he was sick.
Yo mama is so fat that you should really take care of her because diabetes is a serious problem and she might die.