Health jokes
When Stephen Hawking is ill 🤮, do you take him to Curry's PC World or the doctors? 😂😂😂😂
What's about 12 inches long, has a purple head, and can make women scream all night?
Cot death.
Why did the bike fall over?
Because it was two tired.
What's autism! My name is Dee Snutz!
Shorts go up, pants go down. Body to body, skin to skin. When it's sniff, stick it in. It goes in dry and comes out wet, And the longer it's in, the stronger it gets. It comes out dripping and starts to sag.
It's not what you think it is. It's a Lipton tea bag.
Get your mind together!
What do you call a Black person having a seizure?
What did the doctor say to the mother after delivering the baby? Sorry.
They struggled to lift the weights, but I got watermelon to keep me in shape.
I work on medicine; my job is to smell it to see if it's bad :)
I was on the Oregon trail with my friend's brother, Carl. He got cholera, so we threw him off the wagon. When we came back, he was having a seizure and pooping uncontrollably. It was pretty cholerious.
Official orgasm donor.
Why can’t orphans go to the hospital? Because they don’t get homesick.
Yo mama is so fat, she gave a memory foam mattress Alzheimer's.
Why do you never see gay people in wheelchairs?
You can’t be a fruit and a vegetable at the same time.
What do you call a person in a wheelchair that lives in Africa?
Dry Vegetable.
What was the epileptic chef’s house special?
Seizure salad.
What is the hardest thing to eat on a vegetable?
The wheelchair.
You're so bad at games, bro, they gave you AIDS before losing! 😹
Condoms? HA! Those are for pussies!
What’s the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair.