Fucking jokes

A priest asks a nun if she has slept with anyone, and the nun says, "Yes, a fucking hot girl!"

What does the mom (or terrorists, fuck that) say for the (twin) towers to eat?

Open wide, here comes the plane!

TAOST, you didn't submit it, you fuck!

Why the fuck is this guy calling me a crying bitch?

I’m gonna put my AR 15 up your fucking ass and pull the trigger!

I'm 5'6", and my mom is 5'1" and 1/2. She always says she's going to get a suicide vest and fill it with bricks and squish me. I tell her good luck.

And when she tries to hug me, she says, "You're too fucking tall, kid," so I usually reply with "Go get a stool then."

What did Warner Brothers get for making that horrible Joker sequel?

They got what they fucking deserved!!!!!!!!

If you're seeing this, this is your sign to go fuck yourself.

My birthday's on September 11th, I'm gonna turn the fuck up and throw a banger! Then rub my tits in birthday cake frosting!!! WOOOOOOOOO!

Did you hear that Rushdie has a new book? It's titled "Buddha, that Fat Fuck."

Poop is yummy, fuck!

Stan says shut the f**k up or sit your ass down on that b***h chair!

Fuck people who are bigger than me physically, emotionally, mentally, economically, and socially.

Have you ever heard of sex? Because you just got fucked.

"Ahoy, Spongebob! I just committed homicide in Syria, and the one-party state is after my fucking ass! Argagagagagaga!"

Fuck me.

Go fuck yourself!

symple: Why did you include me in this fuckery?

symple: And why the fuck am I the profile picture?

angela: Because you are the thot of the group.

symple: Well it takes one to know one.

symple: Aren't Thot jokes just "whore'able?"

angela: FUCK OFF!

My wife said to me, "You really have no sense of direction, do you?"

I said, "Where the fuck did that come from?!"

If I fantasize about fucking a UCP Cabinet Minister,

Does that mean I'm sexually Conservative?