Play Jokes

Some kids at school made fun of me for playing Halo. I gave them a halo.

Why do people not play uno with Mexicans... because they are always stealing the green cards

What's the difference between Micheal Jackson and a plastic bag

One's made of plastic and dangerous for kids to play with, and the other carries groceries

Why can't a cheetah play hide and seek? Because he's always spotted

Yesterday my daughter was playing in the garden when i saw her kill a butterfly. I told her that as a punishment, she won't eat butter for 1 month. Today i saw her killing a cockroach in the kitchen. I told her "nice try".

Why can't skeletons play church music? Because they have no organs.

When I die can someone play "Best Day Ever" during my funeral?

Why can’t orphans play baseball? They don’t know where home is

What happens when Stephen hawking dies? The windows shutdown sound plays.

Why was Cinderella banned from playing sports? -- Because she always ran away from the ball.

My family loves to have dance parties. My dad will just play music from his iPod, and I'll go to the light switch and make a nice strobe light effect. Everyone loves it, especially my younger cousin. He gets down on the floor and starts breakdancing! It makes him so happy, and he needs that extra joy in his life, especially since the doctor recently diagnosed him with epilepsy.

Baseball is awesome 😎

why can't orphans play online games. Because they don't have parents to sign them up

Why has Stephen hawking's stopped playing hide and seek with his wife? Because she keeps using a metal detector

When Jim was playing on his phone, my grandfather told him, “You use way too much technology!”. Jim then said, “No, YOU use too much technology!” and then Jim disconnected his grandfather’s life support.

Why did they invent glow in the dark condoms So gay guys can play star wars

So I hooked up with a girl at a party, but I forgot that it was a family reunion. (SWEET HOME ALABAMA STARTS PLAYING

A wife decided to leave for a vacation, leaving her husband in supervision of her mother and her cat. After a few days, she called her husband and asked, “How is everything going?” He responded with, “The cat is dead.” She cried out and said, “Why couldn’t you’ve broken the new slowly? You could have said the cat is playing on the roof or on the first day, and the next say it broke its leg, then the next that the poor things dead! Anyways, how’s my mom?” “She’s playing on the roof.”

Why can’t orphans play gta?

Because they are not wanted

Why can't orphans play base ball?

Because they don't know how to hit a home run.