"I will kill you with knife and gun, get ready, Explain Bear, stupid f***."
What does the mom (or terrorists fuck that.) say for the (twin) towers to eat?
Open wide, Here comes the plane.
If I fantasize about fucking a UCP Cabinet Minister,
Does that mean I'm sexually Conservative?
Your forehead is so fucking big, I had to call an Uber to get across the eyebrows to your hairline.
I know it's bad, sorry.
I saw a girl at my job and we ended up fucking, then the test came back and I have hives from my sister.
My wife said to me, "You really have no sense of direction, do you?"
I said, "Where the fuck did that come from?!"
Fuck people who are bigger than me physically, emotionally, mentally, economically, and socially.
My brother has a fucking ass and I wake up to him twerking.
symple: Why did you include me in this fuckery?
symple: And why the fuck am I the profile picture?
angela: Because you are the thot of the group.
symple: Well it takes one to know one.
symple: Aren't Thot jokes just "whore'able?"
angela: FUCK OFF!
What do you tell twins who are in love with each other?
Go fuck yourself!
My bad, I kick me bad in if balls, and he got so fucking mad.
Dino nuggets are kinda hot. Also, I want to fuck the brown M&M.
Friend (Evan): Did you do some dumb shit?
Me: Hell yeah.
Friend (Evan): Did you get us both in trouble?
Me: Hell yeah.
Friend (Evan): Will I still help you because you are my best friend?
Both: FUCK YEAH!
I made an advent calendar for a Jehovah’s Witness.
Behind every door someone tells you to fuck off.
P1: What's the difference between a kid and a hooker?
P2: I don't know.
P1: Wow, you sick fuck!
What do you call a fucked up mullet? A fullet.
Hey babe, I’m looking to get 23 years in 23 seconds, can you help?
Stan says shut the f**k up or sit your ass down on that b***h chair!
My birthday's on September 11th, I'm gonna turn the fuck up and throw a banger! Then rub my tits in birthday cake frosting!!! WOOOOOOOOO!
Did you hear that Rushdie has a new book? It's titled "Buddha, that Fat Fuck."
